haters?

I don't think I'm really uncommon. I got married in the mid 80's and shortly afterwards the oil field went BOOM, CRASH, BAM!!! The shrimp industry had only just recooperated. We suffered, but we weren't alone.

wow

Wow, Rhonda, that is so inspiring! (((hug))) I would love to hear more details of how you made it through.

Its not a problem, but my name doesn't have an N in it. Well, I can try, but my story is kinda sad. I had a few good things going for me though. My grandparents on my dad's side were wealthy and sometimes I got work and nice gifts from them. Hand me downs and new things, but I was never what you'd call spoiled. My other grandparents, on Momma's side were set up, but weren't wealthy (or so I thought). They were down to earth. Grandpa had a huge garden and we ate a lot of vegs and he had potatoes and corn, enough for the family and to sell. I worked with my family as long as I can remember. My grandmother took me like I was her own child, which I imagine, most of us here on SS can relate to. I mean, someone gave us a love for old ways and the earth. She told me 200 times, "I only know one way to work and that is hard." I'd work with her like a little slave. She'd pay me, but I was only a small child in the beginning. Looking back, I think it was some kind of special training she had going on. It was from her that I learned how to pluck ducks, sew, cook, scrub walls and floors, iron, pick beans....almost everything. Momma also gave lessons with all of those things, but she taught me to eviserate and I read all her organic gardening magazines and sometimes Mother Earth News. Learned a lot from those and its a good thing, cuz it came in handy later.
Daddy always put us to work when he was building something, so carpenter skills came early and in home-ec, we learned that a guide sheet was very much like a blue print, therefore a carpenter can make a dress. I therefore concluded that a seamstress can make a house. Anytime DH and I needed to build something and we were at odds about how to measure something, I'd tell him how a seamstress would go about getting the right measurement to know where to cut and we'd give it a try and usually it would work. We weren't in a position that we could solve all our problems with phone calls.
Basically we'd play games with our checkbook balances. Subtract ficticious service charges and incorrectly add and subtract, disregarding the cents at the end of the dollar, unless it was to our advantage.
Unit shopped and only for what we absolutely needed.
Bought things that were reduced for quick sale, such as meat, dairy and produce.
Garage sales for the best bargains and for entertainment. Being a fairly good seamstress I could make almost any pair of pants fit DH and mend all the ripped seams and put on new buckles and buttons or fix a zipper. It was much easier to find him 3 works pants for .25 each than to buy them new for over $15 each.
When things were bad enough that I couldn't afford a blessed thing, I'd economize on the chicken's grain and let them free range, but that wasn't always the best because they'd lay eggs everywhere.....well, I was young and stupid. If I could do it again, I'd do it better.
Basically anytime I'd have something, I'd worry that it wouldn't last and I'd make it stretch a mile and a half.
Unfortunately DH came from a bad homelife and we fought all the time. He could never tear me down enough to completely convince me I was nothing though. I don't wanna talk too much bad stuff on him, even if we don't live together because really he is my highschool sweetheart, the father of my children and we talk everyday and really try to get along. Besides, he was my partner in crime and we went through it together. He will come back home if he has another heart attack and survives (which isn't likely....too much damage), but that is my decission, not ours.
We ate cheap and cooked, rather than going out. We ate stuff we had raised or hunted. If a dog had murdered one of our ducks, we'd kill him/her and it was SSS method. Then.....and this might sound gross....if it was a fresh kill and I could cut away the dog bitten part, I'd clean and eat the duck myself. Coons and upossums were a problem, and the Bruces ate the coons. I was never delicate (a Cajun....or French term, meaning not finicky), so I tried it and it was good, so we'd set traps when we'd have visitors and that would give us a little more meat.
We never really asked for anything, except when we'd apply for a job, but when something was offered to us, we'd take it and make the most of it. I'd rather out-right own a hand-me-down, than share ownership with a finance company.
I'm going all over the place really because I am multi-tasking right now, but Momma used to get me to help with chores and if someone would see her instructing me and me doing it, they'd say,"You training her to be a housewife." and she'd get furious to the point I'd think there was some kind of shame in being one. Well, she'd tell them, "No, I am not! She will know how to do chores, but she will never be dependent on a man for anything!" I really thought poorly of stay at home moms for a long time because of that and it never occurred to me why she choose it for herself, if she didn't want it for me, but I am grateful to her for it because I don't know where I'd be now if I was dependent on a man.....financially or otherwise.
Maybe more later. Ya'll have a good day