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frustratedearthmother

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This is my very first Farmbook posting. Ya'll bear with me and see if I can get into the spirit of "Farmbook"

Here goes:

Did you see the butt on Petunia today? I swear she's as fat as a pig, lol and her daughter is walking right in her footsteps. Now, Petunia used to be a nice girl, but now that she's a single mom I don't know what's gotten into her. She's shaking that fat ham of hers right in front of her sister's boyfriend. How RUDE!

And, oh my goodness... Red's boobs are really dragging. What was she thinking nursing triplets? Doesn't she know that nursing ruins a nice firm udder. I swear, I need to give her the name of my doc! I'm sure he can fix her right up - but then she'd be shoving those 'firm ones' right in Dusty's face.

And, you know what a hornbuck Dusty is! He'd be all over her, but he wouldn't stop there... he'd keep right on going until he conquered every gal in the barnyard. He's such a playa!

Henny Penny - OMG - she's in the 'family way' again. She's sitting on a clutch of at least a dozen eggs. Why does she keep doing that? She's got babies all over the barnyard and all her daughters are just as bad as her! Always sitting on eggs....always trying to re-populate the farm.

That's all I've got right now - we're going out to dinner. I'll be sure and post the restaurant that we're at and a picture of my plate.

I know ya'll be jealous!

Toodles!

No insult intended - all in jest. :plbb LOL! No animals were harmed in the posting of this spoof. All animal rights were preserved and they were rewarded for their participation in this posting by an extra oat or two for dinner!
 

frustratedearthmother

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Well Petunia did it again. She got knocked up by Bobby Boar...the beast! Petunia hasn't really regained her figure after her last batch of 'bacon bits' - so I KNOW this one is going to turn her into a big fat tub of lard! Serves the ol' sow right after the way she's been behaving. What's even worse is that daughter of hers... I think she's in the family way too. Tsk...tsk...SMH.

Don't tell anybody, but I heard that some of the boys ran away from home. Five. Young. Bucks. Just up and left they did. Lookin' for greener pastures and all that, ya know. If they're not careful they'll end up hanging out with the wrong crowd and I know how disappointed there mama's will be.

CluckCluck the rooster is limping because he tried to steal some of the feed right out from under Red's nose and so she just stepped on him. He didn't like it at all, but NO BODY stands up to Red. She's getting kinda cranky in her old age.

That's about all I've got today. Toodles!
 

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