A WITTY REPLY

[Hattie the Hen]

I came across this reply to a poster.
I just wish I could come up with something as witty as this.....!!


I thought this quote was very interesting! I found it on:
http://www.any-body.org/


QUOTE
Recently, in a large French city, a poster featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym. It said:

THIS SUMMER DO YOU WANT TO BE A MERMAID OR A WHALE?

A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.

To Whom It May Concern:

Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans). They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Bering Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia. Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world.

Mermaids don't exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human? They don't have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them not to mention how could they have sex? Therefore they don't have kids either. Not to mention who wants to get close to a girl who's skin is all scaly and smells like a fish store?

The choice is perfectly clear to me... I want to be a whale.

P..S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my grandkids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a latte with my friends. With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, "Good gosh, look how smart I am"

Hattie (who is definitely an old whale)

 

[Lady Henevere]

 

[ohiofarmgirl]

love it!

hey hattie - i've been wondering about y'all across the pond... hows that snow? they've been showing all the crazy winter weather you've been having. hope you've been keeping warm!

 

[Dace]

Very cute!!

 

[Hattie the Hen]

love it!

hey hattie - i've been wondering about y'all across the pond... hows that snow? they've been showing all the crazy winter weather you've been having. hope you've been keeping warm!

Hi ofg

The UK has come to a virtual halt -- we are rather pathetic over here when it gets very cold or very hot.......!!

Schools are mostly closed, we have nearly used up all the salt & grit for treating the roads & a lot of the supermarkets are sold out because people are panic buying......! The weather is hovering around freezing so it is not so bad but sometimes it is more dangerous at this stage as the snow begins to melt a bit during the day but the ground is so cold that it freezes again at night & you have an ice rink by the morning rush-hour.

People just don't organise themselves ; don't think ahead or pay attention to the weather forecasts. If they did half of the panic wouldn't happen. I was very well prepared so I have not run out of anything.

I did have a fall yesterday (on to my knees) on the icy snow. I was trying to stop two young cats (my neighbour's) from catching /killing one of my Dorking pullets. I just reacted too fast& folded up on my knees. I will recover & the important thing is my antics scared the cats away & my little "Dorcus"escaped having only lost a few feathers. My birds are not scared of cats as mine leaves them alone as do the other locals. These two are new-comers & young & silly & they form a little pack........ they don't bother the fully grown chickens but "Dorcus" is still smallish.

Take care & keep warm everyone.

Hattie

 

[murphysranch]

That was terrific! Words to ponder and to embrace as one ages! (like me!)

 

[ohiofarmgirl]

wow!!! well a lot of city folk over here dont get prepared either... so dont feel bad. but out here in the country we all know to keep the larder full! i laughed tho - we went to the store just as our first flakes starting coming down and everyone had already rushed in and cleaned out the bread aisle! we had a horrible 4 day power outage last year and i think they learned their lesson.


sorry about your fall!! yep i've landed in a heap many times. but my hens always point and laugh at me! malcontents!

one thing i was wondering about tho... and i may be mistaken.. but i know that some of the historical paintings of london show the Thames frozen over and people skating on it! so i'm wondering if this is just the weather going back to an older pattern?? humm....

good luck!

 

[user251]

you gotta love a smart butt woman . that is to funny Hattie. by the way arent you just loving all that global warming? were loving it down here in the deep south too, it was 9 the other day, freaking 9 degrees. This is Alabama for goodness sake, but it was hot in the rose bowl !! ROLL TIDE

 

[big brown horse]

Hi Hattie!! I loved it, too funny!

Stay warm dear!

-Sally


P.S. I love that website!!

 

[Hattie the Hen]

Hi ofg,

On the subject of the River Thames freezing I thought you might be interested in this site, It was traditional to hold a Frost Fair on the ice.

http://thames.me.uk/s00051.htm

It doesn't freeze any more --I think the last time it did was in Victorian times.

Hattie