Bee~ Journal of then...

[Up-the-Creek]

My parents are both from Raleigh county,...next county up from Wyoming.

 

[Beekissed]

Could be........ Ya never know! Those southern counties are still a rough and ready place to live...something about those completely vertical mountains!

 

[Up-the-Creek]

I know what you are saying,..These mountains down here harber some stuff let me tell ya! I worked up my family tree,..my fathers side which is from down here in the southern part and WOW! Everyone is kin to each other.No lie! He belongs to one of the largest families from southern WV,...it is scary! My moms family is originally from Roane and Calhoun counties. They moved to Raleigh when she was a youngin for her dads work. My hubby is originally from Logan county,..now that is a wild place. Myself I was born in Ohio,...lucky me.

 

[Beekissed]

There are no words to describe Logan County...one would have to experience that culture for themselves. Do you notice they have a whole different accent than the rest of the state? Its a whole 'nother world......

Now I'm sure we are related. If your papa is from one of the largest southern WV families and they are all inter-related, which I know to be true...well, we is kin, honey! They went down there for a family reunion last weekend.

Sad, isn't it?

Its like that where I live now.....everyone...and I do mean everyone, is related to each other. 7,000 people live in this county and there are 10 names in the phone book......

 

[Up-the-Creek]

Bee you are funny!

My hubbys family reunion was last weekend down in Logan county,..I stayed at home with the kids. Scary down there.

My fathers family reunion is this coming weekend. The Lilly Reunion held at Flat Top in Mercer county. This year they are trying to break the worlds record for the worlds largest family reunion. This event is huge and it lasts all weekend. Southern WV's largest family indeed. They came from France just to populate the appalachian mountains!

 

[Farmfresh]

Weird things will happen ya know gals.

I took an accounting class many years back as an adult and had a little "class friend" that I always chatted with before and after class. At the same time I was getting curious (and braver now married with my own family) about my bio father that I had never met. My maternal grandma took me to meet my paternal grandma (who has lived within 20 miles of me my whole life and was NEVER involved).

Paternal grandma was showing pictures of the uncles and aunts. With each pic she gave a little bio. "He lives in Texas", "she is a beautician"... etc. One of the descriptions was "he is opening a tire store."

A few days later in my class my little "friend" raises her hand and says, "My husband is opening a tire store and ..."

I could not believe my ears. At break I asked her her last name. When she replied with my birth name I was stunned. I was "class friends" with my AUNT! I eventually did meet my "sire" as hubby likes to call him. Weird deal.

As far as the abuse goes. It is how they are trained to handle conflicts. AND what is "normal" in life. We had a couple of children at the Alt school that were adopted into a good family. As babies they were SOLD for abuse. Their bio family was all involved grandma, grandpa, aunts, uncles, mom, dad ... child molestation was "normal" in their family. Poor little kids have a hard struggle ahead of them re-learning what NORMAL is, but at least they have a chance now.

Your mom grew up with such fear and pain. It feels normal to her. Probably compared to the totally out of control way she felt as a child, you dad seems pretty darned kind and good. It is all in comparison to the trauma felt as a child.

With Gods help we can overcome those trials and learn to receive his true blessings. Many abuse people don't think they deserve good things. They just have to learn HOW MUCH God loves them and exactly how HAPPY he wants us to all be.

The nice thing is that both of you seem to have broken the old chains. Your children will have different lives, thanks to your struggles.

 

[punkin]

Book does sound interesting ... maybe a winter read in front of the fire?

I agree with Bee, it is a very good book. Different, but good.

 

[Beekissed]

I'm thinking you are right, Farm. That book was so good at telling how much God loves us that it sent shivers down my spine each time it was repeated. It felt so much more personal in this fictionalized book than it ever felt when I read the scriptures.

It said that God will turn things towards the good...things that were done by humans, to humans. I think I've seen that in every aspect of my life. My determination to NOT live like my parents and their parents, has shaped and formed my nature and my actions each step of the way.

Its a mysterious and awesome thing to contemplate the tapestry of this world...all the threads interweaving to form a bigger picture than we can see. I know that pain doesn't feel good while you are living through it but later you can look back and see that the results of that pain were of benefit in some ways.

I think the problem that happens a lot is that most individuals don't have a chance to look back on the pain because they brought it along down through the years with them....like an ugly, heavy piece of luggage that they refuse to throw away.

<sigh> .....and therein lies the biggest thing to overcome, I guess. That need to hold on to the luggage when we have a way to be free of it. That is what The Shack was all about, really. That the answer was there all the time, but the main character could not see it.

 

[punkin]

Bee,

have you per chance read "90 Minutes in Heaven"? It's another good book that will send chills down your spine and tears down your cheeks.

 

[Beekissed]

I've read 20 min. in hell ( I think this was written by someone trying to speak to an AOL tech support....not sure! )...but not the other one. I think I have it, just never got around to reading it.