First Home

[urban dreamer]

So this October I'm getting married. And we're moving out of his mother's house. This will be our first time out on our own and I need some advice. What do you know now that you wish you knew when you first left the safty of home? Any newly wed advice? I have never had a place of my own and I'm a little nervous about it. Any help will be appreciated. There are big changes ahead!

 

[DrakeMaiden]

Hmmm . . . that is a hard question. I will say that the one thing I did right when I moved out on my own was to live below my means. I still do, but it really helped when some big unexpected expense came along that I had underestimated my ability to provide for myself.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

 

[elijahboy]

get a lawnmower!!!!!!!!!!

always be prepared for an appliance to break ie fridge stove heater or AC if buying

dont get too acquainted with your neighbors at first you never know who is the problem maker

dont go buying all new furniture, check craigslist family or whatever

 

[SKR8PN]

Buy as much land as you can sensibly afford the first time.

Learn to sow seeds, and I ain't talking about the kind that makes babies.

Befriend your neighbors. You'll never regret it.

 

[urban dreamer]

At the moment we are pulling in about a grand a month so I think all we will be able to afford is a small apartment. I would love to buy some land, but I think that will have to wait until we both have reliable full time jobs and are accustom to being on our own (and out of college).

And we almost have everything we need but the house! Pots and pans, dishes, towles, tools, some small appliances, a couple end tables, bathroom stuff. I think all we need is a couch and a kitchen table! I've been saving stuff up since I moved out of my parent's house in preperation to move out. It's finally comming!

 

[elijahboy]

apartment=container gardening and it will save lots on groceries

 

[urban dreamer]

apartment=container gardening and it will save lots on groceries

Already got a container garden! I am sad that the chickens will have to go.

 

[lorihadams]

Aw come on, get some diapers and let it roll! You can have house chickens

I agree with buying as much land as possible.

Pay cash for your honeymoon and expenses on the honeymoon.

Save as much as possible for when you do buy a house.

Buy a smaller house you can add on to later easily.

Get a home inspection before you buy a house.

Don't be afraid for your house to look eclectic, cause it's gonna.

Do things by yourself, don't spend all your time with your spouse.

Keep true to who you are.

 

[Jaxom]

Hmm...apartment renting. Ya have to do, what you have to do. But I would suggest checking local trailer parks. You can sometimes find a trailer you can buy on the cheap and the lot you rent from the park lower then renting an apartment. This gives you more controll over such things as efficency of furnace, hot water heater and so on.

Best of luck!

Jax

 

[freemotion]

I hope this doesn't sound rude....are you doing everything for yourselves as if you didn't live with mom? All the cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc? If not, be sure to do it all or at least contribute a LOT so you get used to it.

I say this because I didn't and it made life much more stressful, having to learn to manage all that stuff all of a sudden.

Above all, go into your new life debt-free. Live on less than nothing and save-save-save. Make do, and gain as many ss skills as you can. I got my house and land at age 40 but aquired many ss skills along the way...even lived in an apartment that allowed me to have a veg garden and it had neglected fruit trees, which I used.

All that said, it is amazingly wonderful to finally be out on your own. You'll see. Woohoo! And the folks are a phone call away, and will LOVE it when you call for advice. Mine still do. Sometimes I kinda make stuff up so they will feel needed. Don't tell. I need an excuse to get them over here sometimes, too. Win-win.

My most important newly-wed advice....you will fight. So have some rules. Ours are....no name calling, no swearing, no leaving the property (can go outside to cool off), no discussing the fight with anyone, etc. And then try to be the first to apologize. Never forget that you can never REALLY take back anything you said. It is in your spouse's brain forever. So be careful. Be polite until you can be loving again. Ask yourself..."Is this the hill I want to die on? Can I give in on this one?" and try to give more than you take. Watch the calendar for your hormonal times and adjust how you respond...don't bring things up that can wait a few more days, as it may simply disappear from your mind by then.

There's more, but I'm off to bed now!