hqueen's collection of Far From the Usual stuff.

flowerbug

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for the bulbing onions i just wait until the stems start falling over and then that is the sign they are done. they need to be cured/dried well before storing them.

flowering for onions depends upon the type of onion, but the bulbing kind usually bloom the 2nd year or if you happen to have a larger onion set that you plant it might bloom. the bulb onions we grow are from live starts that get planted so they don't bloom unless i don't get it harvested and it comes back the next year. sometimes those plants can keep dividing and keep blooming for some years past that too, but that is because the bulb is dividing.

hope the meeting goes well too!
 

Britesea

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I've read that if you want good storage onions, you need to remove any blooms as soon as they happen. Of course, if you want seed to plant next year, you would leave the blooms and write those particular bulbs off.
 

flowerbug

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I've read that if you want good storage onions, you need to remove any blooms as soon as they happen. Of course, if you want seed to plant next year, you would leave the blooms and write those particular bulbs off.
they're strangely shaped, but parts of them are still edible after the flower stalks die back.

normally i harvest the heads for seeds long before they die back all the way because i don't want seeds scattered all over the garden.
 

hqueen13

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Thanks, FEM!
It went about as well as I expected. He did buy lunch, which was nice. We were late getting started, naturally, and he thankfully for me, blew off his appointment with the accountant to continue our meeting. I did start it out with a closed door and the conversation about compensation. When I told him that I found my original pay stubs from 2007, his first question was "how much were you making". When I told him, and told him how much I was making now, and highlighted that it is less than a 1% raise annually over the 13 years, he agreed that it was unacceptably low. Of course, as I expected, he did not immediately offer me a raise. He pulled the same stuff he pulled a while back when we had this conversation and wants to pay me bonuses for projects that are completed. He tossed out the number of $500, which in my opinion for the current project is far too low. Of course, that also says nothing for the projects that I have completed in the couple years since I last had a raise. AND on top of that to be paid less than the HIRING rate for office/clerical work is pretty bad. SO, we are supposed to have another meeting tomorrow, and I will be bringing it up again. I do understand the shakiness of the current situation, but thankfully our business is rolling along VERY well for the second month in a row, so I do not feel bad about asking him for more - or a plan for more as a bare minimum. So, we'll see.
The BF was able to get the pickup truck running again. The $200 part was the fix. On top of the $65.00 part. Of course.
Sunday we did a bunch of cleaning and the new fridge arrived. It got here late enough that it wasn't cool before the evening, and since I had my evening barn rounds to make we didn't get it reloaded. That'll happen tonight I guess.
The BF's family is still being complicated. His dad called on Sunday and said that he and his mom wanted to come up and that he and the BF could be "busy" doing something so that his mom and I had time to have a conversation. No way.
Number 1 - I'm not going to have that conversation in my own home where I can't leave if things go south. I do not want to be in a position where I have to tell you to get off my property or I'm calling the cops. Cuz I will. So I'm not even going to set that up to be a possibility. If things go south, I'll just leave their house.
Number 2 - it was NOT a good day to have those conversations. We were still waiting on the fridge delivery confirmation at the time, and still had to get the old one out, and get things cleaned up around it. The kitchen floor was GROSS, and I wanted to vacuum and mop (never got to the mopping), and I just didn't have the energy to put into a conversation.
And not really on the list, but annoying all the same is that SHE didn't bother to be the one to reach out to me. I don't know if she is afraid of it or what, but she's done the same thing with W and A, she's used another reason to get together as a convenient vehicle for starting the conversation. Instead of just saying "hey, do you have some time to chat?"
Through the call with his dad we also found out that W and A had stopped by the house and had a conversation about their formal wedding plans (they had the courthouse wedding in the fall, and they do want to do an official "real" wedding, the challenge of course is making sure it's on THEIR terms, and not on mom and dad's terms). His dad conveniently threw A under the bus saying that it was "tradition" in her country for the bride and groom to pay for things, and other things. His dad prattled on about how family is everything, and friends are great, but family will always be there for you, and even though the day is for the bride and groom, it's really for the family, too, and blah blah blah blah....
I told the BF later that he needed to make sure that when we have these conversations with his parents that he's CLEAR what HIS beliefs are. I told him if he wasn't (and even if he is...) his parents are going to throw me under the bus and blame me as the reason that he's not all over the family bandwagon, just like they are doing to A. Per the conversations that I've had with W and A (admittedly I've talked with A more than just with W, or even the two of them together), W is just as in favor of NOT involving the whole entire extended family, either. So I made it clear to the BF that he was going to have to take his own stand on it.
I also realized later that one of the reasons that I think his brothers don't care for the family thing like his parents do is that his parents continually complain about the family! Like WTH!? How can you say out of one side of your mouth that family is everything, and then in the following breath complain about every. single. thing. they do? How do you expect your sons to feel about family if that is the message they have been fed for their entire lives? I asked the BF if his dad has EVER said anything positive about the BF's uncle/his dad's own brother. And I don't think I've heard one positive thing said about him, ever. Or if it was, it was followed by a 'comma but' which totally negates whatever was put prior to it.
So that situation is no less messy than it was last week, and is still hanging around. I'd like for it to be resolved quickly, but I have a feeling that it isn't going to be. I just pray that when the conversation finally happens I can stay in my wisdom self and not my reactionary self. Even if I do stay with my wisdom self, there's no guarantee that what I have to say will sink in, either. And if that's the case, we'll just lightly remove ourselves from interactions until things settle down. I have zero obligation to have a relationship with his family, and what level of relationship he chooses to have with his family is also his business as well. His parents are known for holding grudges, and everything comes with strings attached, but at this point I just don't care to be connected to that level of neediness.
 

frustratedearthmother

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I think you made a very wise decision not to allow that discussion with BFs mom to happen in your home. Sigh... I think all you can do is to state your expectations and let the chips fall where they may. (with your BF's mom and with your boss!) People are not so much fun sometimes...
 

hqueen13

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Thanks yall.
And yeah, FEM, you are right. All I can do is listen with compassion to how she feels, and then express with love my own boundaries. What she chooses to do with that information is on her, and I can not control or change her response. I am also unwilling to comprimise my own well being in order to feed her need to feel wanted and loved. She's got to figure out how to do that for herself on her own.
Yesterday evening I ended up talking to A on the phone, because she's pissed off the mom even more. :gigI shouldn't laugh, but I'm also grateful that the BF and I never pushed getting married... otherwise WE would be in that boat. Granted, I think A is probably less diplomatic than I can be, and maybe less kind, but she's still setting her boundaries, which I totally respect. After I got off the phone with A, I updated the BF on what was going on, and that led to us having a 2 hour conversation into the late hours of the night (well way past OUR bedtime!). I'm really glad we had the conversation together because it just strengthened the BF's resolve that he needs to not look to his parents for approval or acceptance, because they just aren't going to give it to him at all. I was so proud of him figuring these things out on his own. I wish he had done it sooner, but I'm just grateful that he gets it now. I'm also grateful that he has my back in this situation, so I know he's not going to abandon me or throw me under the bus. I made sure that he understood that no matter what I say, I will be the bad guy that is taking her prescious son away from her, as will his brother's girlfriends, too. I told him it was really important that he reinforce how HE felt, and back me up in feeling the same way, himself, because otherwise they would write it off as only a problem with me. He totally gets it, and I'm SO glad he does.
The fun thing is that A has told me more of their wedding plans. To attempt to get around the "invite the entire extended family twice removed" issue, they decided to do a destination wedding, in Maui!! :weee I'm SO stoked! Hawaii has been on my bucket list for a long time, so this is an awesome opportunity to make that happen. I feel more prepared to figure that out now than I ever have been before. AND the craziest thing??? Ever since A told me where they were going to do it I have seen THREE cars with Hawaii license plates!!! :epWhat are the odds???? I take all those little things and see them as signs things are aligning, and I have never been led wrong by it. So now I'm even more excited!
So that's the scoop from around here...
OH, we did get the new fridge put in on Sunday. That was smooth and easy. Having a little trouble figuring out how to organize it, but I'm sure we'll work it out. I think I remember the same issue with the other one when we first got it, too. It's quieter than the old one, so that's a plus. It is bigger, but everything has to be organized differently, so working that out has been tricky. But I'm happy overall.
 

wyoDreamer

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When we move our nice French-door refrigerator into this house, Dh had to remove and adjust the trim on the surrounding cabinets to let it fit into the hole the old fridge left, lol. I feel your pain.
 

hqueen13

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Thanks FEM!
Ugh, @wyoDreamer you're not the first person that I have heard of that has said things like that. So many people have had to dismantle walls and all sorts of stuff to get fridges to fit. They're just making them so dang big these days!

Yesterday was a great day, except for ending on a bit of a stressful note. I got lunch for A, and I was almost to the house when the bag tipped over, and in trying to get that upright I hit a curb going around a corner. I checked the tires when I got to her house, and they seemed fine. We hung out in the pool and had a nice relaxing time. I sunburned myself, of course, but otherwise it was great. I left there, and drove back to one of my farms, took care of the animals, and was headed home and getting off on our exit when I heard a funny noise. There weren't any other cars around me, and I thought that was odd, and then my tire light came on. I pulled onto the shoulder, and it was FLAT. I called the BF, he turned off the oven from the pizza he had in for our dinner, and grabbed his tools and had to get on the highway going the other way, drive 2 miles to the next exit, and then drive the 2 miles back to our exit to get to me. It took him less time to put my spare on. The spare was low, but not bad, so I was able to get home. He grabbed the air compressor, and filled the spare, and then checked my tire and it's done. I have to call in a bit to see if the road hazard insurance will cover it. Otherwise I'm buying ANOTHER new tire. I'm so frustrated with myself for it, but there's nothing that can be done at this point. Keep your fingers crossed they'll just replace it and I won't have to fork out the money for a new one. I just had enough set aside to get the alignment done, but there wouldn't be enough to cover the alignment plus a new tire.

I told A yesterday to get W to tell the BF where the wedding was so that I didn't have to worry about accidentally spilling the beans. So when we finally got back in the house he said that when he got home W had texted him and told him it was in Maui. I was excited. The BF was not. He was frustrated that he'd have to be on a plane for 14 hours, and that he didn't know how we'd pay for it. He was complaining that he wouldn't be able to do any projects this year because he'd have to pay for that. I was like look, you didn't know how we'd pay for the house when we bought it. We'll figure this out, and told him to just let it go. I'm sure he laid in bed all night and thought about it, but at this point I'm just going to start seeing what I can do. We've got over a year (it's not until Oct) so I have plenty of time to figure out how to make this happen.

And on that note, I'm going back to the office today to meet with the boss about the current project we are working on. I'll also be having another conversation with him about the pay scale because I don't want to work for bonuses. I want to work for fair pay. And currently my pay is VERY unfair. So we'll see what happens.
 
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