I am worried....

[moneysavingmomma]

I have a 4 yr. old dd who knows her letters and numbers but absolutely refuses to learn them in order. We have tried the songs and anything and everything else I could think of and nothing works. I am starting to think she has a learning disability but our doctor says give it time she is just a child who does everything in her own time (walking included, she was 18 mnt.). Any advice?

 

[Henrietta23]

I work in an elementary school as a speech therapy assistant and I'm the mom of a 9 year old boy who learned things in his own time. So that's where my answer is coming from. That and my gut. She's 4. I don't believe not knowing your letters in the right order at the age of 4 equals a learning disability. I'd listen to the doctor for now, keep exposing her to the alphabet in fun ways and you'll probably find she picks it up quickly when she's ready. DS could not be pushed to learn letters, how to put together a puzzle, ride a bike, tie his shoe, before he felt it was time. He's doing just fine. He left his Montessori kindergarten not reading because the program was child directed (he got to choose the activities he did for the most part each day). He entered 1st grade and within a month was reading at grade level or above.
Certainly keep an eye on the situation since no one knows your daughter better than you, but try to relax. Are you comparing her to other children you know? If I compared my son to his genius level older cousins who were reading chapter books at 5, I'd have labeled him learning disabled. :/ Not the case at all!

 

[FarmerChick]

test her

stick something in front of her she wants very badly.......then tell her to say her ABCs in perfect order from start to finish.....see if she can do it and if she does reward her.

at least you would know if she can do it

I bribed my kid a few times to "test the waters" on if she was being silly or if she had a problem....for me it came down to silly lol

she came home from school counting to 100 but in all silly ways, 10, 11, 32, 33, 65, 2, 98, 100, 6, 5, etc. and I said can you do it right, count to 100? heck no she wouldn't do it, so I thought, hmmm...I said, Nicole if you can count perfect to 100 we will go out and get a toy at the dollar store......of course she did it perfect in a nano second and I was out $2 for a cheap plastic toy but I knew then that it was kid silly games and not a problem....worth the $2 lol

 

[patandchickens]

How is she with pattern/order of OTHER things. I mean, you should follow your own gut instincts, but personally I wouldn't tend to get too worried unless she showed little or no ability to learn OTHER things in order -- elements of a story, words of a song, order-of-operations of a task, being able to continue a pattern that you set up with colors or blocks or whatever, etc.

JMO of course, and you should do what feels right to you,

Pat

 

[TanksHill]

I would try teaching in a different way. If you have been singing, saying them aloud etc.. Maybe switch to something visual and hands on.

Some children just need a different approach.

Don't worry.

g

PS Welcome by the way.

 

[moneysavingmomma]

My DD does the same thing with numbers FarmerChick. I am going to try to bribe her to do it but have in the past and she refused & wouldn't say anything. sometimes I think she is just stubborn.

 

[txhomegrown]

Bribing children just teaches them that if they hold out long enough, they will be rewarded for not doing what they should do. Of course, it is much easier to bribe them than it is to teach them.

 

[emilosevich]

At 4 I would not worry. Like everyone else has said you know your daughter better than anyone else so use your judgement, but don't compare her to other children. She will learn in her own time. My daughter is 5 and just learned how to count to 20, but has been able to read simple sight words for almost a year. I had to find a way that was fun and made sense to her.
by the way

 

[Wannabefree]

I wouldn't worry either. 4 year olds are kinda loopy. MY 4 year old about 60 DAYS prior to entering Kindergarten, wouldn't even wear clothes and shoes *Disclaimer* She is a step DD and was being raised by barbarians AKA grandparents DH and I had just married and I took over "mom" role 2 months before she was to enter school They let her run around in her undies all the time, she knew no such thing as numbers and letters at that point, and she still sucked her thumb, had to have her "banky"(blanket) at all times day and night, drank from a sippy cup, and ate cheerios out of a bowl on the floor like a puppy SOOOOOO, I say all that to say this...if MY little beastie could make it in 2 short months, then you have NO worries! Yeah it was hell, but I think I had a lot farther to go She actually adapted very well once around the other kids. Quite civilized according to her teachers. I gotta say I was REALLY worried with that one and it all turned out fine. I never bribed her away from banky and the thumb sucking, or the clothing issue, or her ghastly eating habits. I just presented to her with all the patience I could muster, what I expected out of her. It worked.

 

[moneysavingmomma]

Well i am so glad to know that I am not alone. DD is still refusing to do it as of tonight. I am just at my whits end that she is going to go to school and not know these things. I still have a year to go before I have to worry really I guess. She will be almost 5 1/2 before she can start school here. Thought about homeschool but not so sure I have the patience to do that.

P.S. My dd sucks her thunb still. Only at when she is tired or mad but I have tried everything in this area known to man and nothing has stopped her yet.