To stay home or not to stay home***I DID IT**

[Seven Hens Farm]

I know that a lot of you stay home and your spouse works out of the house. I would LOVE to be able to do that. Im just not sure how much longer I can stand this job. I feel terrible when my 11 yo has to stay home by himself on summer vacation. I hate the fact that Im too exhausted to get things done around my house, or that I dont have time to put a good meal on the table all of the time. I am just so scared that we would not be able to make it on one income.

How many of you went from working to staying at home? What sacrifices did you make? How did you plan beforehand to make the change?

Any input would be greatly appreciated!

 

[Denim Deb]

First thing I would do would be to sit down and figure out exactly how much you're really making working. I've heard of several people who actually found that they had MORE money when 1 of them stayed home w/the kids. Why? They weren't eating out as much. They weren't spending as much for gas, electricity, clothing, child care, etc.

I've tried working outside of the house. And, for me, it just doesn't work. I never made enough to make up for what I was spending on other things. By staying home, I have time to cook, have a garden, do firewood, etc.

 

[SSDreamin]

I took the gradual approach to staying home full time. I found a great part time job. Worked there until it wasn't feasible any more (DS#2 came along), then was talked into not going back by DH. It didn't take a whole lot of convincing We sat down and figured out what 'extras' would have to go, where we could tighten our belts (which we had already been doing, since I was off), and decided to go for it. DS#1 didn't like it at first - I had always worked while he was growing up (single parent), so he wasn't so sure he wanted me around so much Once he realized there were many benefits to Mom being home, he was fine with losing some of the extras.

 

[Seven Hens Farm]

I dont spend anything on childcare and I RARELY go out for lunch. Thrift shop clothes and shoes.
I think thats why Im having a hard time with this, it really does make financial sense for me to continue working...but my mental health is suffering.

 

[the funny farm6]

I suppose it would depend on if you can survive on just your spouses income. We thined out our extras like cable, eating out, unnesasary trips out of town, and we found ways to cut many others like water and electric. No junk food. And I have a large garden and can supply most of our vegies for the year. We also raise some of our oun meat so that saves on the grocery bill. It just depends on what you feel you can do.

 

[moolie]

I stayed home right from the birth of our oldest child (now 16). We married young, right out of university, so we've always been broke and didn't find it too difficult to give up my income since we had just paid off our student loans. Once our kids hit school, I started my own business and as time has gone on we've found that me working at home works really well for our family. Hubs found himself out of work for half of 2010 and I did add a part-time job to help get us through, but like you I didn't enjoy it--I took an office manager position for a boss who constantly asked me to lie and cover for him and I quit as soon as we were out of the woods because it was so stressful to me to be put in that position.

Is a home-based business an option for you, since it sounds like you need the income you are bringing in now? There are so many turn-key businesses (home sales like Avon, Tupperware, Epicure, Pampered Chef etc.) that have great earning potential and lots of support.

 

[Seven Hens Farm]

We dont exactly NEED the income. It would be very tight without it, but do-able.
My husband promises me he will take care of us. I guess Im just a big chicken to take a chance.

 

[moolie]

We dont exactly NEED the income. It would be very tight without it, but do-able.
My husband promises me he will take care of us. I guess Im just a big chicken to take a chance.

If your husband is that supportive, and you've worked out that you can live on his income, see if you can hang on at work for a bit to build up some extra savings, then just go for it.

(Or go for it now, if work is really driving you crazy--you only live once!)

 

[Wannabefree]

I dont spend anything on childcare and I RARELY go out for lunch. Thrift shop clothes and shoes.
I think thats why Im having a hard time with this, it really does make financial sense for me to continue working...but my mental health is suffering.

poor excuses Seriously...think of fuel costs, wear and tear on the vehicle, extra oil changes/tires, etc. Then think of your mental health, your childs mental health, your husbands...etc. It's not just about finance and self. I know you aren't saying that, but it is a valid reason to reassess how it makes more sense. Who will be better off and how if you stay home? It does affect the entire family, and some things you can't put a dollar value on. It made more sense for us because of food allergies and my time spent in the kitchen, and the affects on both kids and myself and DH. The same formula won't apply to you and yours

 

[rd200]

If your hubby supports it and you CAN afford it.... im not sure what the issue is....
I would LOVE to be home. There are soooo many things i could be doing better if i just had the time at home to do them. I think my relationship suffers with my 10 yr old because when he gets home from school im constantly trying to get stuff done,( I arrive home an hour before he does...) make supper, laundry, cleaning, paying bills, taking care of the other little one, tending to the garden, etc. so we dont really get much time to spend with each other. And its really starting to show in our relationship. If i had more time at home i could get all of those things done ahead of time so when he gets home from school we could have some time together. (not that we dont spend ANY time together now, just isnt the same quality time as i would like it to be)
Just sayin that if you can afford it and you want to do it, then go for it!! You wont regret it....

Hey, and if in a few months you cant stand being home all the time or your finances are suffering or whatever... then go get a job. There is nothing that says this has to be a permanent thing.