Wannabefree...guess what I got in the mail today!?!?!?!?

[Wannabefree]

Oh, and just heard from Grandma, she'll be in dialysis most of the day, and they are running more tests the rest of the day Probably won't do to go today. They are doing a brain scan and blood tests and something else. One result is in, her kidney's are functioning at 5%, thus the dialysis immediately. She is still talking out of her head a lot, because her body is not expelling the medication residue to get it out of her system. :/ Maybe dialysis will help with that though Basically all I can do is sit here and pray and wait.

 

[Wannabefree]

I have more chicks hatching 12 so far in the new bator The Cream Legbar eggs all croaked :/

 

[pinkfox]

yay on the chicks...UGH on the legbars, how are the legbar chicks doing?!
thats one of my worries getting into the more expensive breeds, especially hatching your own shipped eggs are so tempermental

 

[Wannabefree]

yay on the chicks...UGH on the legbars, how are the legbar chicks doing?!
thats one of my worries getting into the more expensive breeds, especially hatching your own shipped eggs are so tempermental

Two words. Fowl pox. I am having a crapstorm for a life right now. The good thing is, it has to stop sometime...right? I'm waiting...kinda patiently. Makes me wonder WHAT am I supposed to be learning from all of this?! And if I learn it, will it stop raining poo on my little corner of the world? I'm open for suggestions from anyone who can make any sense of everything going on right now. I currently can't see the forrest for the trees most days, so I'm ignoring most of it...what I have no control over, and dealing with the rest while trying to figure out where/if I am going wrong I'm just confused. I hate times like this though because I get to where I shut down all emotion and just zombify myself into a routine that LOOKS like who I am, but doesn't FEEL like it. Coping mechanism, but a very annoying one, and I don't like me like that. I am so seriously trying to NOT complain. Am I doing any good?

In short, I am frustrated beyond belief with just about every aspect of my life as it stands right now.

UGH that is a horrible horrible thing to say. I'm gonna go sing to my wilted tomato plants and see if either I kill them entirely or they perk up. If I were a betting person...I'll have dead plants in an hour

 

[pinkfox]

oh hun, i know how you feel, some days you just wonder if you shold say screw it and quit and other days your too stubborn and hate yourself for even thinking about giving up...and the rest of the time you just dont know WHAT to feel...

but if i figure it out before you do, ill let you know...

 

[Denim Deb]

Cindi, if it makes you feel any better, I'm dealing w/the same feelings. I'm trying to do what God would have me to do, but almost daily I'm praying and asking, what do You want me to learn from this? It feels like for every step forward I'm taking, I'm going back about 5 or 6 if not more.

 

[Bettacreek]

Right now, I'm right there with you girly. Feels like the SHTF in my little bird kingdom here. :/

 

[Wannabefree]

I knew you guys would understand what I mean It's been just a few days of incredible aggravation lately. The ups and downs are killing me. One minute is YAY! and the next is UGH! ...it's just TOO much

Anyway, so far we have 12 chicks out of the original 25. Some were infertile. I forgot to count how many I tossed though, then got them mixed up with the next week hatch so I'm not sure exactly how many arre supposed to come out today 12 is good though. I tell ya I'll take what I can get lately

Sorry all you ladies are in the crap heap with me

 

[lazyday]

I have no answers for you but here is a hug you are a strong person and your faith is as strong.

 

[Wannabefree]

Thanks for the hugs Here's one for you too

I think everybody has times like this in their lives. I think I just wish I knew what to DO for myself, and everybody else for that matter Life is NUTZ!