Why we will not use the public school system

[Bubblingbrooks]

In a recent article of the Fairfax (VA) Times [1], a school board candidate wrote, some members of the School Board argued the schools duty in loco parentis to stand in the parents place essentially means that parents rights over their children end at the school door. No parent in Fairfax County would agree.

You probably wouldnt agree, either. Unfortunately, the Ninth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals already has. In its 2005 case Fields v. Palmdale [2], the court held that the parents fundamental right does not exist beyond the threshold of the school door.

http://parentalrightsus.org/

 

[curly_kate]

This is a case of the RESPONSIBLE parents who actually DO care and ARE trying to be a part of their child's education being punished for those who have completely sloughed off their responsibilities entirely on the school districts. As a teacher, I have to say that most of the teachers I know really want parents to be involved and work with the teachers to support the student. Unfortunately, we see a lot of parents with the attitude of "It's not my problem. The school will fix it." This can be making sure the student is fed, clothed, sees a doctor, sees a psychologist, etc. And it seems that one result of this is that there are obviously school districts who've taken this and run with it. I think public schools have the capability of doing a lot of good, but there is so much bureaucracy and politics and BS that detracts from it. :/

 

[DawnSuiter]

I COMPLETELY understand!

We use the public school system as a teaching tool; just not for reading, writing or arithmetic.
The lessons learned there are helpful if you want to live in mainstream America, they are mostly social & civic lessons and help you learn adaptability. For instance, through this our daughter is in a top rated in the state competitive Marching Band and is an officer & staff member in the JROTC, this is her 4th year.

However, we do not believe it's the schools responsibility to teach or educate or child...maybe it was ONCE UPON A TIME, but for the last 17 years we have experienced it, I'd say it's more like a social experiment. We home schooled in the beginning, traveled all over experienced a variety of lifestyles, but then realized she was LIGHT years ahead academically of the other kids even older than she, which presented it's own issues. So we compromised, settled down in a rural house and home schooled AND public schooled. After all, in our district for the last few years, showing popular movies as soon as they arrive on DVD is more important than any form of lesson planning. Shameful of course, if you expect them to teach your kids anything academic.

I realize that when I drop her off at the door, she belongs to them, on some level. It's not "right" but it is what it is. That is why I call it prison. But, we also realize, that is kind of the way it is with A LOT of situations in life, and I want her to be prepared for them all, not just survival in case the "stuff" hits the fan.

I know we're not typical, if we were, none of us would have to worry about things like this, or be appalled at the way the public system is handled.

I KNOW she can live our lifestyle; frugality, self sufficiency with responsibility & morality... but too much of this lifestyle often leaves kids without the ability to participate in the "other" mainstream way of living, the way she may need to live for a few years until she comes into her own. I want her to have choices.

Let me tell you though, showing them BOTH sides of the coin, does not mean they will run away from self sufficiency or a more responsible lifestyle or frugality. For sure with us, it's shown her the truth about both ways of living, and happiness isn't often found in those other households and other lifestyles.

Our stuff may not be awesome or new, and that sucks for about 2 minutes, when she remembers that all her friends want to live here with us, where parents eat dinner with the kids, & family laughs together daily and enjoys planning the future, together.

 

[Bubblingbrooks]

This is a case of the RESPONSIBLE parents who actually DO care and ARE trying to be a part of their child's education being punished for those who have completely sloughed off their responsibilities entirely on the school districts. As a teacher, I have to say that most of the teachers I know really want parents to be involved and work with the teachers to support the student. Unfortunately, we see a lot of parents with the attitude of "It's not my problem. The school will fix it." This can be making sure the student is fed, clothed, sees a doctor, sees a psychologist, etc. And it seems that one result of this is that there are obviously school districts who've taken this and run with it. I think public schools have the capability of doing a lot of good, but there is so much bureaucracy and politics and BS that detracts from it. :/

I agree that most teachers do not want this rule/mindset. But, most get sucked into it from the get go.
It is taught at an academic level during training

 

[abifae]

This is a case of the RESPONSIBLE parents who actually DO care and ARE trying to be a part of their child's education being punished for those who have completely sloughed off their responsibilities entirely on the school districts.

I can see why. Most parents suck. Those few who care go to magnet schools, private schools, home school, or try desperately to supplement outside of the public school system.

 

[curly_kate]

I think that a lot of that comes from the idea that taking a test is the end-all-be-all of education. Teachers are graded on how their kids do on a test, which means we are being held responsible for a lot of things out of our control (IE, where they are coming from every day). Even as a teacher, I would consider homeschooling, especially if I had a child with a disability. The system as it is set up is not effective for a decent chunk of our population. Plus, I wouldn't want them to experience the real-life Lord of the Flies that is middle school.

 

[Bubblingbrooks]

I think that a lot of that comes from the idea that taking a test is the end-all-be-all of education. Teachers are graded on how their kids do on a test, which means we are being held responsible for a lot of things out of our control (IE, where they are coming from every day). Even as a teacher, I would consider homeschooling, especially if I had a child with a disability. The system as it is set up is not effective for a decent chunk of our population. Plus, I wouldn't want them to experience the real-life Lord of the Flies that is middle school.

I know so many teachers that home school their kids!

 

[Marianne]

This is a case of the RESPONSIBLE parents who actually DO care and ARE trying to be a part of their child's education being punished for those who have completely sloughed off their responsibilities entirely on the school districts. As a teacher, I have to say that most of the teachers I know really want parents to be involved and work with the teachers to support the student. Unfortunately, we see a lot of parents with the attitude of "It's not my problem. The school will fix it." This can be making sure the student is fed, clothed, sees a doctor, sees a psychologist, etc. And it seems that one result of this is that there are obviously school districts who've taken this and run with it. I think public schools have the capability of doing a lot of good, but there is so much bureaucracy and politics and BS that detracts from it. :/

Ditto.
My BIL just retired after teaching grade school for 25 years. There were problems with parents when he taught in the big city, practically no problems with parents or students in the small town that he taught in for 20 years.

Do what you need to do in your area, with your own child, but please don't label all public schools of having the potential dregs of society - teachers or students.

 

[abifae]

Do what you need to do in your area, with your own child, but please don't label all public schools of having the potential dregs of society - teachers or students.

True enough, but in my experience, good public school is this fairy tale that you only hear about. *laughs*

Of course, JeffCo Colorado.... We WERE ranked among the worse in the entire US while I was going there. I freely admit I am soured against school.

 

[JRmom]

Most parents suck. Those few who care go to magnet schools, private schools, home school, or try desperately to supplement outside of the public school system.

Wow, I have to disagree with that one. There are many many reasons parents don't/can't send their kids to magnet or private schools, home school, or supplement outside of the school system... finances, parents holding down full time jobs, logistics, etc. I don't think a parent necessarily "sucks" just because they don't or aren't able to do those things.