Daydreaming while waiting impatiently!

tortoise

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Today is a little better. I was able to go feed chickens myself. I love the new latches I made for the chicken coop. I need to have DS14 bring my potato fork to the coop. I need something to toss the litter - chickens aren't scratching enough. The coop has a plywood floor so I can't let it get damp and compacted.

I'm applying my pacing superpower and hoping to get some work accomplished. I'm behind at work and have to work on the 4-H handbook again - more revisions were made at the meeting.
 

tortoise

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Got another call from the high school. They pulled DS14's computer use history and he was on it last night until like 1 a.m. and then back on it at 4 a.m. NOTE: He is not allowed to bring his computer home! He hides it someplace between the bus stop and home and then sneaks out at night to retrieve it. Last trimester I picked him up after school to verify his computer was in his locker. 2 days into the new trimester he is doing the same behavior problem and I am back to picking him up after school. I make it as uncomfortable for him as possible.

Hopefully his trip to the principal's office to be confronted with his computer use history will embarrass him into better behavior.
 

Cecilia's-life

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Got another call from the high school. They pulled DS14's computer use history and he was on it last night until like 1 a.m. and then back on it at 4 a.m. NOTE: He is not allowed to bring his computer home! He hides it someplace between the bus stop and home and then sneaks out at night to retrieve it. Last trimester I picked him up after school to verify his computer was in his locker. 2 days into the new trimester he is doing the same behavior problem and I am back to picking him up after school. I make it as uncomfortable for him as possible.

Hopefully his trip to the principal's office to be confronted with his computer use history will embarrass him into better behavior.
It's such a weird situation that I have some questions. Please don't feel obligated to answer.

Why doesn't he have access to a computer outside of school?

Is your son in trouble with the law?

Does he have a phone?

Why does the school care how long he is on his computer? Or what time?

Is the school also mad at you?

The whole situation make it seem like your son is a juvenile delinquent. (No judgement here LOL)
 

tortoise

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Why doesn't he have access to a computer outside of school?
Gaming, well, it's the lying about gaming
Staying up all night gaming or youtube
Porn
Downloading viruses disguised as games and ruining several computers
Hacking to evade every surveillance or parental control software we've tried
Broke 2 computers in one semester of virtual school last year

He's in public school only because I'm not willing to supervise him with computers or be responsible for his computer use.
Is your son in trouble with the law?
Not yet. He has broken into our neighbor's house several times, including stealing a tablet. Neighbor did not press charges, unfortunately. He has nearly started structures on fire. He will neglect and abuse animals. etc. It's a matter of time until he gets in trouble with the law.
Does he have a phone?
No. He won't have a phone before he is 18 because of his behavior with computers.
Why does the school care how long he is on his computer? Or what time?
His teachers complain about him gaming in class, so the principal checked his computer use. Getting <3 hours of sleep isn't conducive to participating in school the next day.
Is the school also mad at you?
No, thank goodness. We've followed through every time he has been in trouble at school and bring concerns to their attention also.
The whole situation make it seem like your son is a juvenile delinquent. (No judgement here LOL)
Almost there. His behavioral diagnosis is Conduct Disorder. He just hasn't been in trouble with the law yet.
 
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tortoise

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oh, I missed another good one. His behavior and health were declining over a few weeks and his attitude about his lunches was changed. He was mysteriously "not hungry" for lunch. (yeah right, fat chance). Turned out he was stealing hundreds of dollars from DH's wallet to buy Little Debbie snacks and coffee at school. (edited to add: he has about $200 in his lunch account, plus school lunches are free this year anyway, and he was packing a big healthy lunch every day. Access to food or hunger are not part of his strange behaviors around food.)

So I stopped buying his healthy lunch food and stocked up on Little Debbies and sugary cereal. It won't take long for him to experience the nutritional consequences. It has been less than a week and he looks terrible. Pale, dizzy, and increase in chronic pain. No doubt sleep deprivation doesn't help.

Your body doesn't lie. When you eat crap, you will feel terrible. Hopefully he learn the lesson.

Edited to add: he also lost his job because of stealing from DH's wallet. Oops.

Why does he have to learn everything the hard way?
 
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NH Homesteader

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I didn’t realize he had a conduct disorder diagnosis but that makes sense. The head of the special education teacher’s program at my college (who was my advisor for my master’s) specializes in conduct disorders, I think he wrote a few books about them. It’s tough. I hope the school is able to help you, or help you find resources outside of school.
 
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