Grandparents raising grandchildren

[Denim Deb]

I am speaking out of my own experience as a wife, not as a child. For years I put up w/hubby getting drunk and yelling at me. This is verbal abuse. He stopped only because I threatened to leave him. But it has left scars. I'm sure you have your own. I do not know what the laws are in your area, but if they continue down this road, they may find themselves facing charges of child abuse.

Take this for what's worth, but this is not a healthy situation for this child. As hard as it would be for you to take her in now, it may be the only thing that you can do. Otherwise, CPS may come in and remove her if things get bad.

 

[Wannabefree]

I have no place. I'm here a lot of the time too. If my house would sell the situation would change drastically. I do have scars, and so does she, and in retrospect it has made me stronger, better, and more empathetic towards others. I'm greatful for my struggles. What I am attempting to teach her both verbally and by example is that what one intends as harm, can be turned into something positive, and that decision is hers to be made. SHE has control of herself and her reactions. I want her to be proactive and not reactive, for the long term, and she is learning that slowly. Hormones and anger overtake her some days and some days she allows me to talk her down and find alternatives. Everyone has their own struggles. She has been basically an orphan since she was 2, she has already overcome a lot in her 13 years, and she will grow into a fierce woman for having been there, no doubts. I'm proud as can be of where she is as an individual. I do think she will be with me before much longer though because there are some experiences that aren't healthy to struggle through and I will guard her on those because she can't do so herself. I am learning immense patience in this process, and more restraint than I have ever had in my life. So, off we grow...