2022 Resolutions List

flowerbug

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@flowerbug you don’t have kids right? Just saying…

oh ghods no, i'd never inflict myself upon a child. besides being near spectrum myself i also know how selfish i am and what i really need to be happy and while i can tolerate children to some extent there are times when i absolutely do not want to be around anyone else (including a child). IMO you can't do that to a child, especially at a young age. also i think it makes a huge difference between having a child of your own, you get into it as it happens, vs. having them come along later when you get blasted with it all at once (aka no skills at all and no chance to really learn until you do damage later and that's no help to a child at all).

Mom is a good parent, Dad was a disaster (he's ok with very young children up to the age of 2 and then abandons them because he can't cope with someone he can't absolutely control - at least that is how i interpret his actions from when i see him now and know about how he treated me). there's a certain bond at a young age and when that gets broken for no known reason or explanation a child may either cope with it well or not. i didn't and still don't and i know that about myself too :)... um, long story short i guess... :)


And moving would be great… the housing market here is not conducive to doing so!

that is probably the same for a lot of people right now.
 

tortoise

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You are dreaming. There is no such thing!
If you want to be stress free about moving, the only way to do that is make up your mind that you aren't going to let things get to you. Mind over matter. Worry with it all you can, change what you can, then give it to God and get on with life.
My parents knew an older woman that pursued minimalism to the point of being able to move unassisted. She got rid of any furniture she could not move by herself. I admire her, but I think I'd rather keep the furniture and save money to hire a moving company.
 

tortoise

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Mom is a good parent, Dad was a disaster (he's ok with very young children up to the age of 2 and then abandons them because he can't cope with someone he can't absolutely control - at least that is how i interpret his actions from when i see him now and know about how he treated me). there's a certain bond at a young age and when that gets broken for no known reason or explanation a child may either cope with it well or not. i didn't and still don't and i know that about myself too :)... um, long story short i guess... :)
wow. that describes my dad about perfectly. He was okay until about age 4 or 5. Right up until the free will and having one's own interests kicks in. After that, disastrous. Family believes he is autistic, he would be extremely offended and defensive about that label. (2 of his 4 kids and 3 of his 6 grandkids are either suspected or diagnosed with autism... none on my mom's side...)
 

NH Homesteader

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wow. that describes my dad about perfectly. He was okay until about age 4 or 5. Right up until the free will and having one's own interests kicks in. After that, disastrous. Family believes he is autistic, he would be extremely offended and defensive about that label. (2 of his 4 kids and 3 of his 6 grandkids are either suspected or diagnosed with autism... none on my mom's side...)
Yep my dad too. He was actually ok with me because I never broke any rules, but when my younger brother turned 5 or so it didn’t go well, he left when my brother was… 8 I think? Pretty sure he was autistic, definitely sure my brother is, pretty sure I may be too, DD1 absolutely is (none of us are diagnosed).
 

flowerbug

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My parents knew an older woman that pursued minimalism to the point of being able to move unassisted. She got rid of any furniture she could not move by herself. I admire her, but I think I'd rather keep the furniture and save money to hire a moving company.

it used to be that i could move everything i owned by car. two large bookshelves have changed that but they could be taken apart if i really had to - instead i'll likely just get someone with a truck to help or rent one. maybe i won't move again. dunno.
 
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