hqueen's collection of Far From the Usual stuff.

[baymule]

That makes me glad that we have sand, not mud. We have purchased 3 loads of rock for our driveway. The county put in two culverts, making a 40' wide driveway at the road for truck and trailer swing room. The county brought 2 loads of rock for that. We still have a LOT of rock to go! Then DH covered the driveway with wood chip mulch to keep the dust down. When it is dry, the sand makes dust storms.

I feel your pain on buying the loads of rock! $$$$

 

[hqueen13]

@baymule I guess sand presents it's own problems!
We do have a couple quarries that aren't too far away, so we're going to check in with them to find out the cost of rock and see what the options are. The BF got a call from his uncle yesterday afternoon (he'd commented he hadn't heard back from him which irritated him a little bit...), and he offered to bring his bobcat back over to help us grade everything out. Of course his uncle's idea of what he should do and the BF's idea of what he wants to do aren't lining up at the moment. I feel bad for the BF because it always feels like his dad (and now his uncle) never really listen to what HE wants to do, and are always telling him what he *should* be doing according to their opinion. They don't take the time to listen, and discuss the pros and cons of the BF's ideas instead of just saying what he should do. So the BF would rather that his uncle just drop off the bobcat and let him do it, he's certainly capable of running the machine. I told the BF he needs to let his uncle know that, and possibly find a way to help his uncle get the machine over here so that takes a little bit of the control away from his uncle. We'll see what happens. I also told the BF I don't want to listen to him complain when his uncle doesn't do what he wants him to do and he has to redo it anyway. We'll see how all this goes...

Otherwise, we didn't get much done this weekend. Or at least nothing big. Friday's weather sucked, it was cold and windy. I had my lesson, which didn't exactly go as planned, but was exactly what Storm and I needed, along with a healthy dose of humble pie. Working with horses has a funny way of bringing up all sorts of things that relate to everything else. So that was challenging, but needed. After that, I raced over to Cowboy and Coyote's to check on them, and then we headed down the street to a farm that was hosting a benefit for a local fire department. It was a concert, which was nice, but super loud, and I was already totally exhausted by that time. We didn't get home until almost 11 because I still had to make 1 more farm stop after we left the concert.
Saturday we got up slowly, and decided to go out to breakfast since we'd left the BF's car at Cowboy and Coyote's house, and I had 2 stops to make that morning. We didn't get home until almost noon. We decided not to do much outside since it was crazy windy and cold outside, and that's just not my kind of weather. Once we got home we decided to tackle getting the winter clothes out since it was going to dip below 30 Saturday night. I'm so glad to have that done so now I can be warm and stop wearing the same two sweatshirts repeatedly! Other than that, we didn't do a whole lot, I had to go back out to 2 farms that evening, and so the BF made chili and mashed potatoes, which hit the spot for the cold weather.
Sunday I got up and headed out to the farms since I had to get through all 3 in the morning. I didn't get home until about 11:30, and the BF was out clearing the leaves off the roof and gutter, and then blowing some of them in the front yard as well. I let him do that and laid down for a bit since I had a tension headache. I got up and the BF came in and we made some lunch. He went out after that and changed the oil in my car, and I did some work on the computer. After that I headed back down to check on Cowboy and Coyote and then we ate leftovers for dinner when I got home. Then I soaked in the bath and that was pretty much it for the night.
Nothing exciting at the moment. I know the BF really hopes that he can get the grading done next weekend, and I do, too, because it would be so nice to be able to actually park in the driveway again! We can't even park as close as normal because the dirt is covering part of the bottom of the old driveway!
I think I'm going to have a slightly easier week this week, the farrier is coming, and I think yoga class might be canceled because she's changing the schedule again. I'll be able to switch back to the Friday morning class, which is kind of awesome, even though it means I have to mostly complete my barn chores before I go to yoga. So hopefully I can have a little time to catch up on a few things and breathe a bit this week!

 

[frustratedearthmother]

Geeze - hope BF can get things straightened out with the uncle. Help is great - but help should listen to what you want and not insist on doing what they want!

 

[baymule]

They still see him as a little kid...…

Reading your running here and there to take care of animals, sure makes me glad that I only take care of my own--and they ALL are right here at home. We have worked very hard to have the infrastructure in order to be able to have the fencing and shelter for them. It takes time and money-more money than time. LOL

 

[hqueen13]

@baymule you are TOTALLY right. And I think they love him and want to help and support him. The trouble is they're not doing it in a constructive way. I see this so often when observing families, especially the elder/child relationships, whether it's parents or uncles. SO many times the elder generation doesn't give the younger generation a voice to learn and explore, they just tell them how they would do it because they think somehow that will make the children look at them with stars in their eyes. It's a terrible way to do things because it actually pushes the child away, which means the elder "tries harder" and that just makes the vicious cycle continue. I see it a LOT in his family, and I can see it some in my own family, though I've learned how to not play into it as much. My mother is terrible about "shoulding" me. There's always something I should be doing according to her. It's never said in malice, or because she thinks I'm stupid... but it can easily be interpreted that way, and I think she'd recognize that if she stopped to think about it.

Well, things have sort of devolved this week. The BF officially got sick on Tuesday, there was no denying it anymore. And then his boss sent him home yesterday, because the BF doesn't know how to decide that he isn't well enough to be doing something. I blame his workaholic father and corporate america's drive for perfection (i.e. robots for employees...). So then by last night when he was worse, and having a horrible time breathing, I finally packed him up and drove to patient first. They were very helpful and kind, and gave him an allergy med for decongestant, and also a few days of prednisone to help his body fight back. The worst part is that I don't have a whole lot of sympathy. I'm not a very good care taker when someone sick! LOL. I feel bad, but it feels to me as if he's being a big baby. I know he's not feeling well, but it feels like he's being super dramatic about it. I really have no way of knowing, and I'm trying to be patient and loving, but I'm not that interested in dealing with him. He's home again today, but I'm in the office so at least I don't have to worry about that, he can be whiney and wheezy all he wants by himself. And hopefully he'll pick up after himself, but we'll see how full of dishes the sink is when I get home.

So pretty much nothing has gotten done this week since he's been down for the count. I got a little cleaning done yesterday, but not much. I did try to do some things to help get rid of the germs in the house, but that will all have to be done again once he's better. I actually get to have an "off" day tomorrow, the only thing I'll have to go out and do is take care of Cowboy and Coyote, which is awesome. So I can spend some time working on my business stuff and puttering around, and I can have my morning like I like it - slow and easy.

So we're apparently supposed to get 3-5" of snow, followed by rain and mixed with sleet. I beat the weather this morning and got into the office before it started. But I have to go do farm chores this afternoon because the usual girl doesn't think she'll be able to get there since her mom drives her up out of the city. It means my Friday is free, but I'm not thrilled about having to work in the very cold rain. The high today is only 38. Blech. I hope it goes smooth and easy, we'll see. I'm planning on leaving the office about 2 to try to get out before traffic hits. At that point I don't really care of the horses come in early, and neither does TM. I hate having to do stalls on a day after they've been in for so long, but that's not my problem this time.

We have a meeting this morning in the office, we'll see if everyone gets here on time since I hear stuff falling outside the window...

 

[sumi]

I hope your BF gets feeling better soon. I don't have a ton of sympathy for whiny sick people either. Especially those that cannot return the caring when I'M sick. Less said about that the better

Yay for a day off! How is your business stuff coming along?

 

[frustratedearthmother]

Sorry BF is sick. Yuck on the weather!

 

[baymule]

When men get sick, they are drama queens. Big, BABY drama queens that revert to 2 year olds.

 

[hqueen13]

IKR!? What is up with men being such big babies when they are sick???
Things went downhill fast in our house at the end of the week last week, LOL.
Friday, the BF started to complain that his eyes hurt, and they were goopy. By Friday evening, it was really bad, and I can sympathize with that! We decided it was best to head back to the prompt care, except the one we went to wasn't open (they close at 6pm on a Fri, what the heck!?), so we had to go to a different one. He was still seen fairly quickly and they decided it was a sinus infection, and it was literally coming out his eyes. BLECH! Thankfully, it wasn't pink eye, but it was basically acting like it. So they gave him eye drops and started him on an antibiotic.
Saturday I came down with it, and on top of that was really disappointed because we were supposed to get a load of hay from my hay guy, and he didn't communicate all that well with me (he's a farmer through and through...) and so he wasn't there when we got there, and the bricks were stacked too high to really easily load them into the truck. So that means we drove the gas guzzling pickup truck all the way down there for no reason, and it also meant that we had to come back on Sunday to get it loaded. I was really, really disappointed because I had swapped my barn chores so it cleared my schedule Sunday which meant I wouldn't have anything to do Sunday and wouldn't need to take care of any horses. This meant I'd have to go move the hay, which is what I didn't want to be doing. I really fell into the pits about it, and was just feeling terrible, plus I could tell I had caught the BF's cold. That afternoon he finally coaxed me into talking, and that was a good thing. We got back on the same page together, and so that was good. He can end up resenting times when I'm working extra hours or doing business stuff and I'm not available for him. He forgets that those things are so that I can have better outcomes later, and keep my bills paid. And he also forgets that as soon as he gets his read end back in school he's going to be unavailable for me almost completely. He was a bit more level about it after that, which made me feel better since it was frustrating that he resented when I wasn't right there for him. Of course, what the heck he expected us to be doing if I was there for him I don't know, because most of the time it wasn't like there were other things we could have been doing if we'd had the time together. I reminded him of that, too, and he seemed to make the connection. So I spent most of the day napping and laying low. I had to take care of Cowboy and Coyote one more time, and so he went with me and we got Chinese food, which was nice, and ended up lasting us over 3 meals. Pretty good deal LOL.

I guess I haven't updated since the snow.... That was CRAZY!! I've never seen that much snow in the middle of November in my life! We got about 4" before it started to rain, and the roads were really BAD when I was leaving work headed to the barn. I got soaked and was exhausted by the time I was headed home. The horses are always so antsy to come in when the weather is like that, which is no fun after I've been cleaning stalls for an hour and a half already. I was drenched when I got in the car since it was raining pretty good at that point. The snow was really tough to move around in because it was so muddy underneath and the snow itself was really wet. By the time I left the farm at almost 5 the roads were much better than they had been since it had been raining. It mostly all melted on Friday, though anywhere it had been plowed it's still sitting, which is surprising.

That brings me to the Thanksgiving forecast... The HIGH is only 30, and the low is 18, which means colder on the farm! I have to do barn chores on Friday morning. It's gonna SUCK!! Everything is going to be frozen solid!! Although, in the car, I did just realize that I think we have an old fashioned pair of ice tongs somewhere in the house that were here when we moved in... and if I can get some kind of basket on a handle, and then something like a crowbar, I can chop the ice and get it out of the troughs a lot easier than using the heavy pitchfork, which I have to carry to all the tubs. I'm gonna have to think this one through and see if I can figure out how to make it happen... Because carrying that dang pitchfork stinks!

Anyway, Sunday, we didn't do much other than move hay. There were 3 busted bales in the brick of 21, which was super annoying, AND as I was trying to move the flakes as best I could so it wasn't wasted, a whole bunch dumped back on my face. I dumped a crap load of hay out of my shirt when I got home. I soaked in the tub later that evening, and that helped me feel a lot better.

So I'm doing ok today, still not moving fast, and my throat is a little sore from not being able to breathe easily, but not that bad, really. The BF really did have it a lot worse than I did. I try to be compassionate, but dang it's difficult. He does take pretty good care of me when I'm sick, so it isn't fair to complain. Now we just have to find the energy to clean up the dang house, it was dirty to begin with, and not it's dirty and germy which is just gross! Thankfully I don't have to do any barn chores on Thanksgiving, which is awesome!

Oh, AND in the news of things that are a bit surprising... the mortgage company finally did refund the double payment. Now I don't have to worry about an extra payment coming out on Dec 1. It cost us a $10 wire transfer fee from the bank, but whatever. It'll sit in our account for 2 weeks until it's ready to be paid again, and then we'll be back on track. So as of right now, I will still have 1 full payment ahead. That will probably change when we have to get the gravel, but I'm thrilled that I'm this far ahead! I also double checked, and we started using this version of the budgeting system back last Nov, and the BF has managed to bring his net worth up by about $5000 in a year. Most of that was due to the tax return, plus we paid out the insurance in one lump sum, so if it hadn't been for that, it would have been even higher. That's pretty amazing. He has about $1000 on one credit card, plus just over $1000 on another that I think we'll be able to eliminate when the tax returns come in, they'll be lower by then anyway. I'm super proud of him for doing all of that while paying the mortgage and power bill, plus the water bill, himself. He was only paying $465 towards the rent, and no power bill and we had no water bill before we moved a year ago. So he's managed all of that on his salary with only a tiny raise late in the year. I know he doesn't feel like he's in a better position, but he really is. Plus we've been able to arrange it so that we can eat out and do some things along the way without going deeper into debt. That's just amazing! (If anybody wants to check out YNAB (you need a budget) let me know, I have a referral code, they offer 34 days free, plus a discount if you use a referral code. It's SO worth the cost! I happily pay for that every year!!)

Happy Thanksgiving to ya'll. Very grateful for my "family" here, ya'll listen to me rant and rave and hear the annoying parts of my life. I've really come to enjoy your company over the years (geesh, it's been a long time, hasn't it!)

 

[frustratedearthmother]

Ugh - so sorry both of ya'll have been sick. I'm sure it didn't help getting hay dumped in your face... argh! Great deal on getting the extra payment back. It's such a good feeling to have a little buffer.

Happy Thanksgiving to you to. Hope you have a wonderful day and maybe that the weather doesn't get as cold as they predict!