Savingdogs-Saving the chickens

I wish I could say that were true, TanksHill. If truth be told, I'm clinically depressed. It has just been too much for me to have all these different illnesses, the Meniere's disease with the profound hearing loss and vertigo, the migraine associated vertigo, I have IBS and recurrent kidney stones, oh and allergies. I wanted to MUCH to have this land, this place, so many years ago, but now that I have it I'm just sick all the time. It is nice that I don't have to work, but it is at the cost of more than I was willing to pay because I can't really enjoy it.

I do love to look out the window and it could be worse, I could be ill like this and stuck in the city, with no animals and no fosters. I always wanted to live near TREES and I have at least 1,000 trees. I'm rich in trees, rich in dogs. But I'm an outgoing, driven, creative and formerly energetic personality and now my only outlet to the outside world besides my immediate family is...............you all. And Facebook. It is so dynamicaly different from my previous "life"....and not because I've moved to the country. I love it here, that part is wonderful. I'm blessed that if I'm stuck at home, THIS is home.

But my house is like a little shack. With a few exceptions, my friends deserted me. I went from fun and lively and a part of everything to someone who they have to repeat themselves 20 times to make each sentence understood. I don't blame them. It is tiresome for ME to try to be ME around them. I make the effort to be with my family because they get upset if I don't, but I have only a couple "real life" friends now who actually would bother to come to my house.

And my doorbell and telephone used to ceaselessly ring! It is just such an odd change, I can't quite get used to it. I use all of you as my support group. In some ways, you guys are all I have and I thank God for you.
 
SD, if I lived closer, I'd come and visit you. And, I wouldn't care in the least what your house was like. I know someone who bought a house a few years ago. I went to see it. I was saying what a great place it was. Then I realized, I had looked at the barn. I had looked at the pastures. But, I hadn't looked at the house!
 
Well I got the living room looking decent today at least. Trouble hangs out in there and makes such a mess! I spent about four hours cleaning! I found an entire load of laundry, a sinkful of dishes including most of the spoons and a giant can of trash! I had to vacuum with the SHOP vac, for goodness sakes. But it does look better. I put the woodstove stuff away for the year.

But of course as soon as I'm done with that, I look out and it is SNOWING? I don't get this crazy spring. It did turn to hail rather quickly and it is actually clearing out now, but it still was an amazing day for April.

I actually felt pretty GOOD so far today. I made a big pot of chili and the house smells good as well as looking nice for a change. Now if I can just make them NOT TOUCH ANYTHING. :somad
 
Here you've been so supportive of me and what I'm going through, and you're having your own troubles.

I'd love to smell your house right now (ok, I realize that looks a little weird but ...) ... I love how my house smells when I've cleaned AND have a crockpot of chili bubbling away.

But I think later this week I'll make some pork-n-beans. It's the only way I can get beans in my son... lots of bacon, brown sugar, and a little garlic.

About being stuck out the country and people aren't visiting you as much (or if at all.. not sure exactly). You found out who you're true friends are. And we're here. And so are your facebook people.
 
My chili came out yummy! I found a skillet cornbred mix in the back of the cupboard at the last minute and it is scrumptious. I have a chocolate cake cooking now.

RL, I love being part of the group and being supportive. I've always been a do-er for others and part of groups. This helps me be more like me still.

And no one here ever says "never mind" because they have tried to tell me something three times and I still don't get it.
 
My hearing isn't quite as bad as SDs, but I find myself saying that more and more. I've taken to wearing something over my ears almost the whole time I'm outside because the wind really bothers them. SD, does the wind bother you as well?
 
Yes, and also SOUNDS bother them. No one can understand that, but I bet you can. Certain sounds especially. Some sounds actually bring on vertigo.

Tanks let not smack Deb, she has vertigo as well and understands me only too well.
 
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