2023 Resolutions

FarmerJamie

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Resolution moving closer....stay tuned
So.....part of the find our own place saga was getting my portion of my late mom's house/property (passed in 2015) for part of a down payment. My sister wanted to buy me out instead of selling it. Drama event after drama event excuses preventing the transaction. She had the funds. I had the quit claim deed ready to go since August 2019. Her youngest daughter and son-inlaw wanted to buy it, which I was cool with. They were angry about lack of progress and found another place

Last month I engaged an attorney to send her a letter stating either pay me, put the house on the market, or I initiate a sheriff auction. Took the lawyer two weeks to get the letter served as sister was refusing acceptance. Once served, she immediately contacted me with the convoluted process she wanted to do....nope, simply exchange the deed and cashier check at the lawyers office.

Transaction completed this morning!

Oh, and now the county health dept is investigating a possible septic system leak. Not my circus anymore
 
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FarmerJamie

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Sometimes we must take action!! I can see you tried "being nice" first. 8 yrs was waaay too long. Yeah, family, I get it. Hope you can now "house hunt" 😍
The list of excuses was tremendous. Even her lawyer this morning, looking at the notarized date, said "wow, August 2019, I guess you have been waiting for a while"

My patience was in honor of my mother. In her final days, she said her regret was her kids did not have a good relationship like she had with her siblings. I was a huge jerk in my teens, I admit, but have corrected my ways. She's a control freak (big fish in a small pond) and everyone just sighes and says "that's just her". I emotionally shut her out when she sided with my ex during the divorce on unfounded allegations/badmouthing. I miss my BIL and youngest niece the most.

Onwards to positive things!
 

flowerbug

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So.....part of the find our own place saga was getting my portion of my late mom's house/property (passed in 2015) for part of a down payment. My sister wanted to buy me out instead of selling it. Drama event after drama event excuses preventing the transaction. She had the funds. I had the quit claim deed ready to go since August 2019. Her youngest daughter and son-inlaw wanted to buy it, which I was cool with. They were angry about lack of progress and found another place

i'm sorry it went so badly. some people have a different sense of time and urgency when it comes down to getting things done.


Last month I engaged an attorney to send her a letter stating either pay me, put the house on the market, or I initiate a sheriff auction. Took the lawyer two weeks to get the letter served as sister was refusing acceptance. Once served, she immediately contacted me with the convoluted process she wanted to do....nope, simply exchange the deed and cashier check at the lawyers office.

Transaction completed this morning!

congrats! :)


Oh, and now the county health dept is investigating a possible septic system leak. Not my circus anymore

ugh!
 

flowerbug

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i'm so glad that Mom did what she did to simplify things. i have been living here for nearly 20 years (my how time has gone by so quickly). the last time my sister came to visit they were driving someplace to visit someone and my sister talked my Mom into changing the house situation so that it just passes directly to me. all of my siblings have their own places and are doing ok. i'm also doing ok but i do not own a place and would have been forced to sell the house under her previous intentions so now i'm not forced out when she passes away. eventually if i do sell it i can honor her original intent which was to divide things four ways among all us siblings. my sister also talked to my brothers to make sure things were ok with them. this was not my idea at all, in fact i didn't know it was a topic of conversation until they'd already decided upon it and had talked with my brothers. so... ok with me. it makes things easier for me for sure. not being forced to sell during a possible bad market and then having to find another place to live or all that hassle is nice and then even if i do decide to sell and move or something else comes up then it's not like i've been kicked out of my own home. so my sister did something nice for me. :)

Mom did not like being on my accounts as a joint owner so another part of getting things squared away was setting up my sister as my beneficiary if i kick the bucket before Mom dies so that my sister can use the funds to make sure Mom is taken care of properly. that's all i care about. Mom has been my closest friend my entire life so i have no issues at all with her being able to use what i have left after i croak - she's welcome to it. if Mom does pass away before i do then i will have to change things again but that is ok. at least i won't be forced to do anything major.
 

farmerjan

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@FarmerJamie ... we had some of this "crap" with my parents estate... and the lack of agreements with the grandchildren that are the primary inheiritors.... the 4 children were specifically left a $10,000 settlement in the will and then the rest was split into 6 portions.... finally got enough agreement that us "children" got our check a couple months ago... parents have been gone for over 2 years... but the estate is still not all settled yet and the lawyer is just milking it in my opinion... my son is one of the grand children and he is just disgusted with it all...
But I cannot imagine going through that for as long as you have. I would have pushed it alot sooner... Just be glad it is done and you are out of it... Sad that she even hurt her own daughter and sil with the stupid BS.... but they are probably better off "elsewhere"...

Good luck with a hunt for a place... just a shame that you were not able to do so a couple years ago when the mortgage rates were at the 2.8% like I got mine in 2020....
 

FarmerJamie

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@FarmerJamie ... we had some of this "crap" with my parents estate... and the lack of agreements with the grandchildren that are the primary inheiritors.... the 4 children were specifically left a $10,000 settlement in the will and then the rest was split into 6 portions.... finally got enough agreement that us "children" got our check a couple months ago... parents have been gone for over 2 years... but the estate is still not all settled yet and the lawyer is just milking it in my opinion... my son is one of the grand children and he is just disgusted with it all...
But I cannot imagine going through that for as long as you have. I would have pushed it alot sooner... Just be glad it is done and you are out of it... Sad that she even hurt her own daughter and sil with the stupid BS.... but they are probably better off "elsewhere"...

Good luck with a hunt for a place... just a shame that you were not able to do so a couple years ago when the mortgage rates were at the 2.8% like I got mine in 2020....
I'll just say my sister and I are two different people. She will have to answer for her level of integrity one day, my conscience is clear. All for a few dollars.
 

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