What if DH/DW Couldn't?

tortoise

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Those of us with a partner or spouse might differentiate work between "his" and "hers" tasks. Smart plan! Until someone get sick, injured, or dies.

What does your partner/spouse/family do that would be difficult for you to do? Can you learn to do the tasks? Can you outsource them? Can you do without?
 

Trying2keepitReal

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It would be difficult for me to do anything mechanical, it just doesn't come natural for me. My DH does pretty much all the fixing and set up around the house/property. I usually assist--his runner basically. I could probably learn to do some-like change the oil on the car or replace window clips or something but to try and do electrical or plumbing I would have to reach out to family/friends or hire from the outside. Living in the country I don't think that I could live without.

One the flip side, DH would say that he has NO clue what the kids schedule is, how they like their oatmeal/others favs or how to braid hair but he would manage.
 

tortoise

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@Trying2keepitReal inspired this thread. It's something that's on my mind often.

My farm is very very good for my physical health. However, I currently could not maintain the property or our SS adventures without DH.

  • Lawnmowing
  • Pasture mowing / bush hogging
  • Fencing
  • Making hay
  • Sorting sheep, catching and moving them, such as for shearing and loading culls/market lambs for auction
  • Castrating lambs
  • Trimming hooves (I could probably learn this I have done goat hooves a couple times, but no guarantee my grip strength is sufficient)
  • Anything preventative health - DH is a veterinarian so I have never needed to learn anything about it.
  • Harvesting and butchering - DH does everything from grazing to primal cuts. I can manage from there. I have done rabbits (hated it) and can do chickens after DH skins them. I can't pluck chickens because of grip strength, even the scalding them part is not within my abilities (we have a mechanical plucker)
  • Cutting wood for heat, and getting it dried, and moved to the house, and moving more wood to the house in winter
  • Anything outdoors in cold weather. I have cold intolerance and touching metal items in winter (bucket handles, hydrant handle, latches) is excruciating painful. This is why I don't raise rabbits, opening cage latches for daily care was too painful in winter.
I'm stopping now because it's difficult to think about everything I can't do (yet?) Maybe we can learn from each other an solve some of these problems so we are more capable of managing when our spouses/partners/family are unable to do their typical SS tasks.
 

Trying2keepitReal

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Thankfully we only have chickens, for now, but I tend to them 100%. DH built the coop and then he was like "ok done".

I also currently do all the lawn mowing-but DH does the plowing, which I could figure out if needed, but it is so cold and I hate slippery anything. I hate weed wackers-so I hand trim but I could use one if needed. I also can split wood but I would NOT be able to down a tree, a little scary for this lady.
 

tortoise

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Building a chute system and training my sheep to it would solve the sheep handling problems. However, DH sees no point in it, and I can't build it myself. Someday DH is going to get seriously injured when sorting sheep and have a change of heart.

I bought a moldable rubber to put over latches. I need to install my prototypes on my chicken coop door. I want to replace the metal bucket we use in the barn. The handle is bent so that it's easy to slash water on one's legs (and I do too often!). I would use the moldable rubber to cover the bucket handle. This is low priority because DH has been willing to do winter chores, but it's a problem I CAN solve.
 

FarmerJamie

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In my case, I do 95% now. The 5% the DW does is stuff she CAN do, and I asked her to own those tasks, if just to take the load off of me. :(

Chronic illnesses are the worst. Without me, she would be hard pressed to do the canning, etc.

The first wife and I could do stuff interchangeablely, she just chose not too. Lolol

Looking forward to seeing other's responses
 

tortoise

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If I could fence and move sheep, I might be able to avoid lawn mowing. But sheep will preferentially eat my landscaping. Hire lawnmowing service or remove/sell landscaping plants and fence my yard as pasture?

We mow to reduce harborage for snakes and rodents.
 

tortoise

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In my case, I do 95% now. The 5% the DW does is stuff she CAN do, and I asked her to own those tasks, if just to take the load off of me. :(

Chronic illnesses are the worst. Without me, she would be hard pressed to do the canning, etc.

The first wife and I could do stuff interchangeablely, she just chose not too. Lolol

Looking forward to seeing other's responses
You know I feel this pretty hard. Empathy for your wife's struggles and sympathy for your burden.

I couldn't can by myself until I bought electric canners. With the Presto digital pressure canner, it holds the temp in the jar warming phase so I don't have to be cognitively able to time prepping the canner and jars and the food. I prep the food, refrigerate it, then reheat it and can it a different day. I set the electric water bath canner on the floor so I can do my canning while sitting down. :) I know there's a lot more to all the steps to modify, but the electric canners were a huge difference for me. Getting small batch canning books helped too. I like the Food in Jars canning cookbooks and Small Batch Canning and Preserving. I mostly do small batches, but 3 pints here and there adds up without exhausting me.
 

frustratedearthmother

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My situation is a lot like @FarmerJamie's. My DH's health is compromised (and he's a city boy) lol.

I do the majority of SS stuff around here. DH does what he can. He can ride the lawnmower and he can do some weed whacking - just not a lot at a time. He's burning some limbs now that the baby hurricane blew down a few weeks ago. But, all animal chores are mine, except he feeds the dogs when he can.

I take care of the electric fence and pen building. He usually hangs the gates with my help. Pasture perimeter fence was done by me, a neighbor and some students that helped me out occasionally. That was a while ago and hopefully never has to be done again, lol.

I buy the feed, I unload the feed and I feed the feed. I unload and move the round bales with my trusty tractor! I love my tractor, lol. I butcher. He generally does the shooting (but not always) and I carry on from there. I skin, I gut, and (clumsily) cut up the meat. From there I do the freezer wrapping to canning and until recently - cooking. He's been cooking lately and is getting really good in the kitchen!

I like to cook and when I do I am the messiest cook in the world. I use every spoon, fork, pot, pan but he cleans them all up for me.

I can even change tires, lol.

He does take a supporting role - but it helps me immensely. I guess if DH passed I could carry on. Would I want to.... dunno.
 
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