what to do when your spouse doesn't "get it"...ss that is!

[me&thegals]

What has worked here is long-term, subtle brainwashing Each step is made slowly, by itself and frequently without comment. When it has become habit, I move onto something else. Really, though, that's just the way that works best for me. Makes things become a habit and not a traumatic change. But, it has worked for my family, too!

 

[patandchickens]

What has worked here is long-term, subtle brainwashing Each step is made slowly, by itself and frequently without comment. When it has become habit, I move onto something else. Really, though, that's just the way that works best for me. Makes things become a habit and not a traumatic change. But, it has worked for my family, too!

That is so true. And well put If you make it a big Issue and try to convince them of the concept, you get resistance... if you just mysteriously get a bug up your butt about closing the drapes on cold nights, or not buying doughnuts, one thing at a time, it sneaks in and becomes habit

Pat

 

[Dace]

What has worked here is long-term, subtle brainwashing Each step is made slowly, by itself and frequently without comment. When it has become habit, I move onto something else. Really, though, that's just the way that works best for me. Makes things become a habit and not a traumatic change. But, it has worked for my family, too!

That is so true. And well put If you make it a big Issue and try to convince them of the concept, you get resistance... if you just mysteriously get a bug up your butt about closing the drapes on cold nights, or not buying doughnuts, one thing at a time, it sneaks in and becomes habit

Pat

I completely agree with you two. This is how I roll....just adopting a small little change here and there rather than a large proclamation. The slow brainwashing seems to work.

It reminds me of the old story of how to cook a frog: If you drop him into a pot of boiling water he will hop right out as soon as he feels the heat. If you put him in a cool pot of water and turn on the heat...by the time he realizes that it is dangerously hot it is too late! LOL!

 

[patandchickens]

It reminds me of the old story of how to cook a frog: If you drop him into a pot of boiling water he will hop right out as soon as he feels the heat. If you put him in a cool pot of water and turn on the heat...by the time he realizes that it is dangerously hot it is too late! LOL!

ROTFLMAO over the choice of analogy

Next time I notice my DH having subliminally absorbed some new, Quite Sensible Of Course , change in routine, I expect I will think "ha, his frog is cooked!"

LOL


Pat

 

[Dace]

!

Then he'll get mad at me if I mention shopping at Goodwill. I told him that I wanted to find some flannel sheets to make napkins and he says, "I don't want to wipe my face on someone's nasty sheets."

My Dh is not thrilled about my natural/non toxic cleaning goal. He thinks it is stupid (not his words) and freaked when he saw me spraying vinegar on the kitchen counter. He had been grumbling about how bad the stainless fridge looked...I just could not work out a nice finish on it. He was bugging me to buy some chemicals. Yesterday I rubbed a little olive oil on it and it looked great. I asked Dh if he thought the fridge looked better..."Yes! Much better, what did you use?"........My response? "I am not telling you, you really do not want to know!"
Now we are both happy !

 

[MorelCabin]

Ive gotten my family so used to natural cleaners that when I do bring in a store bought cleaner they all complain about how nasty it smells and gives them a head ache:>)

My DD who is in her own place now must have picked up on something over the years because she refuses to use anything store bought and asks me all the time what is natural and safe to use.

Gotta remember to try that olive oil on stainless steel...

 

[Beekissed]

I'm still amazed that a MAN even noticed a woman cleaning, let alone what the outside of the fridge looked like!

 

[Cassandra]

I'm still amazed that a MAN even noticed a woman cleaning, let alone what the outside of the fridge looked like!

So true. Every time after John cooks the (white) kitchen cabinets are covered with drips of stuff. I don't know how he does this EVERY time!! But I ask him why he didn't clean it and he's like "clean what?"



Cassandra

 

[lorihadams]

Well, Chad helped me grate soap today for our laundry detergent And he even said,"here, let me do that for you so your hands don't cramp up." He knows that my hands cramp up on me from the fibromyalgia. Couldn't believe it. He asked me today why it was better to use the homemade stuff and so I explained the benefits and he seemed okay about it. I asked him if he had noticed a difference since we started using it and he said not really so I guess it's okay.

I'm starting to think that if I just change things slowly and then force him to ask me questions that this might just work.....hmmmm

 

[Dace]

I'm still amazed that a MAN even noticed a woman cleaning, let alone what the outside of the fridge looked like!

LOL..well in his defense I will admit that in the morning the sun hits the fridge at just the right angle that smudges and finger prints really stand out....a real spot light shines on them!!