Dealing with MIL during FIL ALZ

Mini Horses

Sustainability Master
Joined
Sep 2, 2015
Messages
7,137
Reaction score
14,703
Points
352
Location
coastal VA
@Lazy Gardener, is absolutely spot on! They have the staff to address issues that we don't at home. It was certainly necessary for both my mom & me. Time had come when the 24 hr care was absolute. They are fully trained. It is what's needed for this disease.

Mom spent almost 2 yrs in assisted living situation. She was 92 1/2 when she passed. Had been on soft food and help eatng for about 6 months. Went to bed and slipped away.

Her location had semi-private rooms, open halls with sitting areas, large TV rooms, dining rooms for eating, hair dresser (she loved her hair done...for 30 yrs!), activities, movies, church, etc. -- I addition to the physical therapy, doctors, nurses, regular foot care, showers & bathing, laundry service, etc. Sure wasn't free but, she was well cared for in all ways.
 
Last edited:

wyoDreamer

Super Self-Sufficient
Joined
Sep 29, 2014
Messages
1,798
Reaction score
2,443
Points
267
Nothing to add besides :hugs

Looks like my dad is starting to loose his memory. He has periods of short term memory loss and those episodes are becoming more frequent.
 

Mini Horses

Sustainability Master
Joined
Sep 2, 2015
Messages
7,137
Reaction score
14,703
Points
352
Location
coastal VA
Sorry about your dad Wyo....also, falling seems to be one of the things that happens early on. Be watchful of that.
 

Mini Horses

Sustainability Master
Joined
Sep 2, 2015
Messages
7,137
Reaction score
14,703
Points
352
Location
coastal VA
After my mom's hit -- a woman who previously had an extremely good memory! -- I began researching. Not only to help her but, because "I DON'T want to go there!"

As we age, not only do our systems slow down with physical workings but, many chemicals are at reduced production in our bodies. The cause of many health issues. But the brain gets hammered. Good health, activity, correct eating and supplementation of some vit/min is terribly important.

While they do not know what "causes" AD, they do know things that appear to reduce the chances in a given population and have surmised things that help prevent, or cause larger impact.

For instance, in India & China, the incidences are far lower. Tuermeric in India, veggies in China...both are felt to be important in reduced inflammation in the body. Organic veggies, normally have more nutrition, vit/min. Some oils are better for you. Mediterranean diets have good components. Fast food & highly processed with chemicals & who knows what -- are bad. Activity -- physical and mental, helps. Weight gain in later years a BIG no, no. Quite often, that is because of reduced activity & increased eating. Seniors often don't eat well when living alone. Smaller family units -- not like years back when several generations lived together, or extremely close -- can create less activity, poor eating. Plus, it seems that arthritic people seem to be less targeted by AD. Again, they surmise it is due to taking anti-inflammatories more than those people without the arthritis.

:idunno I'm not a fanatic but, I have taken it upon myself to address my life and these issues that seem to correlate to a lesser chance of AD. I CAN see things that happened to my mom and could have been prevented, maybe sparing her....eating habits, significant weight gain, low activity, too much sugar, no vit/min control, on & on. :(

But then, I feel strongly that MANY of today's health issues in the total population are contributable to eating and exercise choices that are not good.
 
Last edited:

CrealCritter

Sustainability Master
Joined
Jul 16, 2017
Messages
10,730
Reaction score
20,185
Points
377
Location
Zone 6B or 7 can't decide
So sad still :( I took my wife to go and see her father in the nursing home Monday early evening about 6:30. He was in bed flat on his back under several layers of blankets snuggled up with a toy baby doll on his chest hiccuping every few seconds . In the 15 or so minutes we were in his room with him, trying to talk to him he answered only two questions with a yes and would constantly go off into a zone (space out).

I have a tremendously hard time, when someone is in this kind of shape. I feel so helpless, there's nothing I can do to help.

I watched my best friend, a big biker dude suffer and shrivel away from cancer into nothing but a 90 lbs skeleton covered with flesh. In the hospital, he turned to me and said, It's time to go home, a big smile came upon his face and then he passed away.

That tore me up, deep inside my soul and every since, I just don't do well holding myself together anymore in circumstance like this. I know I'm not alone, others have been with people when they have died, its just so hard to deal with. That same feeling of helplessness came over me when I seen my father in law laying in the bed at the nursing home.

I know this is all in Gods hands and that's exactly where I have to leave it. This is beyond my ability to fix.
 
Last edited:

Lazy Gardener

Super Self-Sufficient
Joined
May 14, 2017
Messages
4,626
Reaction score
5,877
Points
292
Location
Central Maine, Zone 4B
Yes. You do have to leave it with God. Death can either be a sweet home coming or a terrifying event. If you or anyone else wants to have a private conversation to deal further with this matter, please do not hesitate to send a PM.

I consider the actual process of dying to be similar to that of giving birth. Some folks do so gently, with minimal pain, while others suffer greatly. I am thankful that there are plenty of medications that can ease the physical suffering during a lingering death.

That's the physical part.

But, there is also the spiritual part, and NO ONE need be afraid of what lies on the other side of death if they have decided what to do with Jesus.
 

CrealCritter

Sustainability Master
Joined
Jul 16, 2017
Messages
10,730
Reaction score
20,185
Points
377
Location
Zone 6B or 7 can't decide
Yes. You do have to leave it with God. Death can either be a sweet home coming or a terrifying event. If you or anyone else wants to have a private conversation to deal further with this matter, please do not hesitate to send a PM.

I consider the actual process of dying to be similar to that of giving birth. Some folks do so gently, with minimal pain, while others suffer greatly. I am thankful that there are plenty of medications that can ease the physical suffering during a lingering death.

That's the physical part.

But, there is also the spiritual part, and NO ONE need be afraid of what lies on the other side of death if they have decided what to do with Jesus.

My FIL has accepted Jesus as Lord and Christ.
 
Top