Are we living our dreams?

[rhoda_bruce]

Well, so much can get us discouraged. When our cup is half full its also half empty and its easy to look more at one than the other. I was a bit discouraged, briefly yesterday. I was thinking how DH's heart condition might severly slow down my barn's roof and how I've had to tap into my savings I had set aside for the tractor we wanted, too many times and now I will have to start over and so on. Then suddenly I asked myself,"Well, when will you live your dream?" and I just mulled this over in my mind and began thinking about all the ways I can bloom where I'm planted, regardless of not having everything in picture perfect status and according to the schedule I had set for myself.
I said to myself, "Go ahead, Rhoda. Live your dream, now." And I grabbed a net and caught an un-needed roo and slit its throat and I skinned him and did the same to the next and plucked the next. I just worked around the mess. Then I issued a death sentence for the 2 smallest drakes to become Christmas dinner. Told DS to put them where I had the roos.....well, he didn't listen to me, but I don't think that will stop me. Just easier if they don't have a big glob in their gullet. I figure if I can keep that as my motto for a while....Live your dream, now....that I will be more productive. If I have to wait for a tractor, I might wait a long time. If I have to wait for DH to be healthy, then I may never do what I love.
Well, thats what was going thru my mind yesterday and the effects are apparently still with me, so I'm going out there and live my dream. So...are you living your dream? Is something stopping you? And if so, is there a way around it??

 

[goatgurl]

just spent the last hour catching up with you. dang girl you've had quite the year. I'm sorry for all your dh has put you thru. i can so identify. I've found that the best revenge, if you can call it that is to learn to live well and take care of you and yours without them. and to let them live their life without your help. my dd was 13 when her dad went to find himself and lo and behold he found himself living with some other woman. he is now on his forth wife and I've finally realized that it's not my fault. he has never been happy with any of them because he has never been happy with himself. don't feel to sorry for him ok.
i think you should snag the neighbors swing set and use it for your garden. i can see twine going down to the sides of the beds for peas, beans, cucumbers or things to climb up. and to hold up the tarp in the winter time for the chickens to live under. and the chains and things will come in handy for something in the future.

 

[Britesea]

Pan de Higo (Spanish Fig Cake)
by The Gilded Fork on 12/01/2008


Pan de higo is a traditional way to preserve figs for the cold winter months. The artisanal fig cake is a specialty of Jaen in Andalusia, and as it contains no flour, the cake will last a long time. This is such a traditional and amazing recipe we haven’t given it our usual twist – we’re just presenting it in its delicious simplicity. Pan de higo travels well, and is perfect for a Spanish-themed picnic; pack along with chorizo, manchego or garrotxa cheese, some crusty bread, and a bottle of Spanish wine.

8 servings

Ingredients

1 pound dried figs
½ cup Marcona almonds
¼ teaspoon ground cloves
2 tablespoons sesame seeds
½ teaspoon anise seeds
Cinnamon, to taste
1 tablespoon honey
Brandy, as needed to bring the mix together

Equipment

Food processor

Preparation

Toast the almonds and grind them in the food processor, pulsing gently until the almonds are chopped, but stop before they turn to a paste. They should be of varying sizes.

Clean the dried figs, removing the stems, and mince them in the food processor.

Mix the almonds with the figs, the ground cloves, the sesame seeds, anise seeds and a dash of cinnamon, to taste. Add the honey and just enough brandy to hold the mixture together, mixing well to evenly distribute the seeds and the liquid.

Lightly flour a clean counter and form the cake into a loaf shape or log shape. Place the pan de higo in a container with a weighted plate on top to compress it, and let stand in a cool dry place for several days to dry it out.

Service

Slice the pan de higo and serve with slices of manchego cheese, or serve drizzled with honey. It’s also lovely with a glass of sherry.

 

[baymule]

From what I read, your kids are blessed. They are blessed to have such a wonderful mother, blessed to live on yard that turned into a farm, blessed to have such good food to eat and blessed to be so loved.

It doesn't matter where you are in life, there will always be kids that have more "stuff" than your kids and there will be kids that have less "stuff" than your kids. Just keep their feet on the ground and teach them life isn't about "stuff". They'll be fine.

 

[baymule]

Sounds like to me that he made a terrible mistake. But in doing so, he has set you free.

 

[FarmerChick]

if you can buy up what is around you that is a great thing!!

I bought 3/4 acre at a higher price cause I was determined to get it. gave me space on the side of my house property line that was despertately needed to keep away the neighbors encroachment. worth every penny

 

[Britesea]

You are being badly abused, emotionally. Where does he get off acting like you don't know enough to order a cake for your child's birthday??? And he's enlisting your daughters help in the abuse. Be prepared, he is probably also trying to alienate the other children (and other relatives) as well. It's an important part of the modus operandi of an abuser to cut one off from all lines of support. Get your own friends, make doubly sure your children know you love them, even if you can't afford to get them tons of cool stuff like daddy does (that's what mine did).
As far as the drill is concerned... I think it would be a good idea for you to get your own stuff, and have as little contact with the b****** as possible. Otherwise, you are just continuing to give him opportunities to drag you down into the pit he's dug for you. Have your own BD parties at your house. He's NOT invited- he can have one at his house too, if he feels the need; the kid will love it, lol
It took me 10 years to get over 7 years of similar abuse, and that was with the help of a supportive new husband.

 

[baymule]

Rhoda, you need a boyfriend. Stop letting this loser ex make you miserable. You are trying to be the better person, but sometimes, it is just time to STOP. Screw that scum bag. Get yourself a life-a life that does not include him in anything at all. It will real make him angry and he will sabotage everything he possible can in retaliation, so just be ready. Oh, and cut off the $$$$$ NOW. No more. You don't owe him anything, if anything, he should be paying YOU in the form of child support. Creeps like him remind me of my own ex-creep and you are much too good for him. Ok, rant over.

 

[baymule]

This man is eat up on the inside. I don't know enough about your situation to even fathom a guess on what is eating on him. But it is evident that he blames you for his unhappiness. He might be your childrens father, but he is doing all he can to make your life as miserable as he can. He can only make you miserable if you let him.

Stop wasting your time and your life feeling sorry for him. He is what he is and you can't cure what is wrong with him. You have young children who need a mother. You need to look after yourself, your happiness, your health-both physical and mental, so that you can look after your children.

You deserve happiness.

 

[rhoda_bruce]

Well, tomorrow and next day, I expect shipments of chicks to come in. Bantams first, then standard breeds. That ought to be fun. All my older chicks are in a stall to finish them out.
My godson and DS are now going to work together, so they can carpool.....yeehaa!!
I might as well get started myself on the fence. Maybe if I do, DS and the nephews will join in.....after work, of course. At this point, I think my lady friends might come help me, just to make sure it gets done.
I must look really different going out to do my chores lately, with my hair fixed, nails painted, leather open toed shoes, shorts or dresses....always like I'm expecting visitors. Guess I just want to feel good, so I decided to look like I want to feel. Hey....its a start.